Time Ticks Away
by galindapopular
Summary: Julie wants to start her junior year by leaving the mistakes of the past two behind. But that becomes more complicated because of her little sister Jen, who started her freshman year at Eden Hall JP, JA
1. First Day Back

**Summary: Starting her junior year Julie's determined to leave the mistakes of her past behind her. This is made all the more complicated by her little sister Jen, just starting her freshman year.**

**A/N: Soo, here's the deal, I know the last thing I need is another story, but, I was noticing a great lack of Julie/Adam lately, and I missed writing them. Plus I just rewatched Freaks and Geeks, and I sort of got this idea of Julie being a sort of Lindsey Weir type character. So here's what I came up with. Hope you like it.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing

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**Time Ticks Away**

**Chapter 1: First Day Back**

Julie Gaffney sat on the steps of the main building at Eden Hall Academy. It was the first day of her junior year, but she didn't feel excited. She picked her fingernails and pulled her jacket closed around her.

"What are you pouting about, Cat Lady?" Greg Goldberg asked. She looked at him and shrugged.

"I'm not pouting," she grumbled.

"You are kinda pouty," Connie Moreau said. "Is this because of Jen?" Julie looked at her friend, shooting daggers. "Ooh Kay," she stretched it out. "Not about Jen."

"Who's Jen?" The guys all said at the same time.

"My sister," Julie said. They looked at her. "She's starting here today, she's a freshman. You probably won't see her much." Julie didn't talk to, or about her younger sister much. The two didn't have much in common. They were both blond and on the honor roll (their parents would have it no other way, the honor roll, not the hair color) but other than that, they were exact opposites. Jen was girly, preppy, popular and always did the right thing. Julie got good grades, but especially since her tenure with Ducks began was a bit of a trouble maker, and her parents still mourned that their oldest daughter was a tom boy. Jen was the perfect daughter, at least as far as her mother was concerned. Now Jen was at Eden Hall, although she had made it very clear to Julie that she was _not _going to spend four years bumming around with her freak older sister and her freakier friends. Connie had met Jen that summer and pronounced her, quite sarcastically, "a lovely girl."

* * *

Jen Gaffney stood at her locker carefully glancing around the hallway. She was so happy to be here. She just knew she would fit in at boarding school. Even if the only way her parents would agree to it was if she went to the stupid one in Minnesota that her sister went to. She closed her locker after seeing someone she recognized walk past her.

"Adam!" She said chasing Adam Banks. He glanced at her ad then stopped. She knew that Adam was one of Julie's friends, but he wasn't like most of them. He'd come to visit this summer, and Jen couldn't believe that he was friends with her sister. He was so sweet and funny, and cute.

"Oh, hey Jen," he said. "Having a good first day?"

"Oh sure," she said casually and hugged her books to her chest. "I was wondering though," she stood up on her tip toes and then rocked back on her heals, Adam never heard what Jen was wondering because the bell rang and the halls were suddenly full and they got pushed apart. Jen was pouting, since she really wanted to talk to him. She headed to her class and sat down glumly. She sat through the class and looked over the syllabus. She'd read most of the books on the reading list already. Then she wandered into the hallway, hugging her books to her chest still. She was looking at a bulletin board, that had a flier for cheerleader tryouts and smiled. Wouldn't that just piss Julie off? Julie was always complaining about the cheerleaders.

"You would definitely look great as a cheerleader," she turned and saw a guy standing looking at her. He was tall, muscley and had dark curly hair. He was wearing jeans and a black tee shirt, that was tight enough to show off her very toned pecks, and a black bandana around his forehead.

"I um," she stuttered. She felt really funny the way he was looking at her.

"Hey!" Jen had never actually been that happy to see Julie in her whole life. "Stop perving on my sister, Portman! I'm serious."

"I knew I liked what I was seeing," Portman grinned. "Hopefully certain things run in the family, huh babe?"

"Don't make me puke," Julie rolled her eyes as Jen shrunk against the wall. "Stay away from her or I'll tell the whole school about how you cried after," he glared at her marched away. She looked at Jen. "Are you OK?"

"I um," Jen said. "That's Dean Portman?"

"Yeah," Julie rolled her eyes.

"Was he like your boyfriend?" Jen squeaked.

"Something like that," Julie nodded. She decided it was probably better that Jen never knew that Portman was never really her boyfriend, they'd just had sex a bunch of times the year before. "Anyway, if he bugs you let me know. I'll kick his ass."

"I can take care of myself," Jen said, standing up straight.

"Whatever," Julie shrugged. "So you're trying out for cheerleading?"

"Maybe," Jen said. "Why do you care?"

"I'm interested in what you do," Julie said. "Look Jen,"

"Oh save it," Jen said, "Mom and Dad aren't here, you don't have to be nice to me." Julie sighed. Served her right for trying.

"Fine, whatever," Julie sighed. "Good luck," she walked away. Jen pulled out a pen and signed her name up for cheerleader tryouts.

As Julie walked up the hallway Portman started walking with her.

"So that's your sister," he said. Julie looked at him. "She's cute."

"Stay away from her Dean," she said. "I'm serious."

"I don't think I'm the one you have to worry about," he said, nodding up the hallway, where Jen was now talking to Adam and giggling and twirling her hair around her finger. Julie dropped her jaw. "Maybe you should tell your boyfriend to stay away from her." When she'd broken things off with Portman he'd gotten it out of her that the reason she was doing it, was because of how she felt about Adam Banks. And of course Jen liked Adam. Jen and Adam even looked like a couple. "I'm not busy tonight, if you change your mind."

"I'm not going to change my mind," she gritted her teeth and marched away. Portman laughed.

* * *

Julie plopped into her chair in her room, still feeling miserable after classes ended. Connie looked at her.

"So it's about Jen, right?" Connie said. "The pouting?"

"Portman was hitting on her," Julie said. Connie looked at her. "He didn't know who she was, apparently, and she didn't know who he was, because I was very careful to make sure that no one in my family saw or met Dean." Connie laughed.

"Yeah, but Portman hits on people in front of you all the time," Connie said. "I mean, while you two were together he would. What are you so freaked out about? It's not just because it's Jen, is it?"

"Not exactly," Julie said. "Then I saw her with Adam," she mumbled.

"Oh," Connie whispered, "yeah, I guess that would be hard. And I mean, Jen is like, you, but actually Adam's type." Julie nodded.

"Yeah," Julie said. "I never should have broken up with Portman." Connie looked at her. "Or I guess I really should have."

"I am tying you up tonight if you try to sneak out and go see him," Connie said. Julie crossed her arms. "I mean, I know you were in love with him, but he treated you like crap. You deserve someone much better, like Adam."

"That's worked out so well too," Julie rolled her eyes. "He barely acknowledges my existence!" Connie looked sympathetically at her friend. They went off to practice in silence. As they got their pads on in the locker room, Julie glanced over at Portman. He winked at her as he peeled his tee shirt off. She swallowed as her mind drifted back six months.

* * *

_Julie groaned softly as Portman pulled her close and nibbled on her neck. She wrapped her legs around his waist and arched her back._

"_Oh," she exhaled as he finished and she fell limply back against the bed._

"_Thanks Babe," he said genially, "I needed that." She nodded and started pulling her clothes on. He didn't hold her or anything, he never did. He pulled his jeans on. "I'll see you later."_

"_Sure," she nodded and he kissed her again. She sat quietly as he walked downstairs. She looked in the mirror and pulled her hair into a ponytail. Then she walked downstairs, the party was still raging. She glanced over by the kitchen and saw Dean with his arms around a cheerleader. She bit her bottom lip and walked outside and sat on the porch steps wiping her eyes. _

"_Hey," she looked up feeling a gentle kick against her back. She smiled as Adam sat down with her. "So he's being an asshole again?" She nodded and hugged him and cried into his shoulder.

* * *

_

"Hey," Adam said sitting down next to her on the bench in the locker room. "I saw Jen."

"Yeah," she nodded. "She mentioned it." He nodded. "Thanks for being nice to her. I want things to be easy for her but you know, how she like,"

"Hates you?" He teased and bumped her. She laughed. "You doing OK?"

"Yeah," she nodded. "I'm fine. Come on, we should get out there."

"Sure," he nodded. "Listen Julie," he said and she turned. "Um, are you busy this weekend?"

"I mean, there'll probably be a lot of homework," she shrugged. "But I can probably swing something,"

"Yeah?" He said happily. She nodded. "Cool, I was thinking we could go for a run on Saturday," Julie stared at him. He was asking her to go for a _run _with him?

"Oh, sure," she said. "I mean, I could use a new running buddy, I guess." She used to run with Dean. But that was less running and more jogging to a spot in the woods where they would make out.

"Awesome," he nodded. "See you out there."

"Uh huh," Julie nodded.

* * *

Jen rushed back from the library towards the freshman dorms. She hadn't realized how late it had gotten. There was so _much _homework. Cheerleading tryouts had gone really well.

"Hey there," she stopped in her tracks as Dean Portman intercepted her on the path.

"Oh, hi," she said softly and kept walking. He walked along side her.

"So, did you go for it?" He asked. She looked at him quizzically. "Cheerleading."

"Oh, right," she said. She wasn't sure what he was asking about. "Yes, I did," she said proudly. He nodded.

"Good for you," he smiled and looked at her. Really looked. Jen, physically, at least, was Julie's exact double. But she seemed like a softer more innocent version. Even softer and more innocent than Julie when he'd first met her, and they'd been 12 then. "So were you studying?"

"Yeah," she nodded. "How did you know?"

"Cat always studies at night," he chuckled. Jen nodded and then drew slightly away.

"Why are you talking to me?" Jen spit out after an awkward silence of a few minutes.

"Huh?" He said.

"Why are you talking to me?" She repeated. "Julie told you to stay away from me."

"Do you do everything your sister says?" He asked. She bit her lip.

"Well, no," she said, "but, I mean, why doesn't she want you to talk to me?"

"Probably," he said grabbing a branch and stopping, "because she thinks I'll corrupt you." Jen looked at him.

"I doubt she cares," Jen mumbled. He looked at her. "How come we never met you?"

"What'd you mean?" He asked.

"When you and Julie were going out," Jen explained. He looked at her startled. "Why didn't you come to Maine, or go out to dinner with us when we visited or anything? Scooter did, when she went out with him when she was a freshman."

"I uh," he said. "Julie never invited me to Maine, or out to dinner with your parents."

"Well, that figures," Jen mumbled as they got to the dorm. "Bye," she waved and walked inside. He smiled as she walked inside. Clearly, Jen was completely clueless. And also clearly, he could use this to his advantage. He'd listened, (sort of) when Julie would complain about her sister. Just flirting with Jen would drive Julie nuts, and probably nuts enough to at least take her top off, if not actually have sex with him again.

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**Please review! It's kind of a darker direction for me, so I'm interested in where it's headed.**


	2. An Eventful Night

**A/N: Thanks for reviewing! I appreciate it. I'm jamming tons of drama into these chapters, I hope you guys enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing

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**Chapter 2: An Eventful Night**

Julie and Adam both laughed as they collapsed on the steps in front of Adam's house. The run had actually been really great. It wasn't much of a date, but it was still fun. She smiled at him and he looked at her.

"Good job keeping up," he nodded.

"Thanks," she grinned, "it's beautiful here." He shrugged. "You don't think so?"

"No Edina's beautiful," he said. "I just hate it here." She laughed and then lay back, hugging one knee to her chest to stretch out. "Here," he said stood up and then leaned against her helping her stretch. She whimpered. "Too far?"

"No, it's good," she whispered. Mostly it just felt good to have Adam leaning against her like this. "Do the other one," he nodded and she lifted her leg and crossed it at her knee. He pressed it forward. "Yeah, that feels good," she took a deep breath and closed her eyes. Adam kept pressing for a minute and then had to stop, and started to blush. "What's wrong?" She asked sitting up.

"Uh, nothing," he said. "I should probably shower, you can too, I mean, in the guest room, if you want." Julie looked at him. He opened the door and held it open. She probably thought he was insane. But he'd felt a distinct tightening in his gym shorts and he didn't need Julie to know that. She'd had enough trouble on the guy front, she didn't need him making things worse for her.

"Yeah sure," she said. "Fine."

* * *

Jen carefully bent down and started going through the contents of her small duffle bag. She'd just finished her first cheerleading practice. It was nice that there was something else she was good at. Portman wandered past the gym and Kim, the cheer captain perked up and ran over to him. Jen glanced over and perked her ears up.

"I missed you," Kim said in this sort of sultry coo.

"Yeah, um," Dean said, moving her hands off his neck. "It's good to see you too."

"So Jason and I like totally split up over the summer," she said. "Are you coming to the party tonight? Maybe we could hook up?"

"We'll see," he nodded and noticed Jen staring at them. "See you around babe," he walked over, Jen immediately shifted her focus to the bag. "Hear anything interesting?" He looked at Jen in her practice uniform, which consisted of a pair of tiny red shorts and a tight tee shirt with an interlocking E and H on the left breast. Her blond hair was up in a ponytail.

"Not particularly," she shook her head. "What's with you and Kim?"

"Nothing really," he shrugged. "She's just a girl." Jen nodded. "We used to fool around last year when she felt like pissing off her boyfriend." She swallowed.

"But I thought," she said and then stopped herself. He looked at her.

"Right," he said. "Julie's your sister," he shoved his hands in his pockets. "Things with me and your sister are complicated," he said sheepishly.

"You were fooling around with cheerleaders while you were dating my sister," she said. "That sounds complicated." He laughed at Jen's unexpected sarcasm and she looked at him darkly.

"Julie and I weren't really dating," he said. "What exactly did she tell you?"

"She didn't tell me anything," Jen said. "She never does. I'll see you around." She walked away. He groaned and followed after her.

"OK," he said. "So, Julie wants you to stay away from me, right?" She nodded. "Do you want to stay away from me?" Jen looked up at him.

"You scare me a little," she admitted. He smirked.

"Good scared?" He asked her, stepping close. Jen swallowed, she didn't know what good scared was. But she had a feeling this might be it.

"I have homework to do," Jen whispered and walked away.

* * *

Julie stepped out of the shower in the Banks's guest room and wrapped herself in a towel. She grabbed her gym bag and pulled on a pair of green cargo pants and a tee shirt and started drying her hair with another towel. She looked in the mirror and frowned. No wonder Adam was repulsed by her. She looked like a guy. Maybe she should borrow one of Jen's sundresses. She shook the idea from her head and walked out into the hallway and then into Adam's room. She smiled. She liked Adam's room. Firstly because it smelled like Adam, all clean and with just a hint of whatever cologne he wore.

"Hey," he walked out of the bathroom, wearing a pair of jeans but no shirt yet.

"Oh, hey," she said, trying not to stare at his abs. "Sorry, I just figured," she shrugged. "I know your parents hate me."

"Nah," he said. She raised her eyebrows. "I mean, they don't love you I guess, but you're not as bad as like, say," he thought for a second. "They really hate Charlie." She laughed and sat down on the bed. "Are you really sure that you're doing OK?"

"I wish you'd stop asking me that," she said. "I'm fine, really, I-I'm over him." He sat down next to her and pushed a wet strand of hair off of her face. "Adam, I," he kissed her softly. She looked at him.

"Sorry," he said.

"That's OK," she whispered. Then they kissed again. This time, more prepared for it, she managed to wrap her arms around his neck. By the time they were laying down Julie could scarcely believe she wasn't dreaming anymore. "Adam," she said softly. He looked down at her.

"Mm hm," he said and kissed her neck.

"I've wanted this for a really long time," she said. Their blue eyes locked.

"Me too," he said. She looked at him and then they kissed again, more violently this time. Adam's hand wandered carefully to Julie's fly and undid the top button and then the zipper.

"Wait," she whispered. He looked at her.

"What's wrong?" He asked. "I thought this was what you would want." She looked at him. "I mean, Jules, come on," she blinked.

"I want us to be together," she said. He sat up. "What did you want?"

"Look, Julie," he said. "I really care about you," she nodded, "and you're beautiful, and fun."

"But?" She said, feeling her cheeks flush in anger.

"Well," he said, suddenly feeling mortified, "like we just talked about, with my parents and everything." She felt her eyes well up.

"So, I'm not good enough, to be your girlfriend?" She said. "But I'm good enough to have sex with?"

"I didn't say that," he shook his head. "Julie, you're incredible, it's not," she shook her head and stood up.

"Save it!" She raged, "you're just as bad as he is, I thought you were different." She marched out.

"Shit," he groaned and fell back against the bed. He knew he'd completely blown it.

* * *

"Of course you're coming," Connie said as Julie pulled her comforter over her head. "It's the first weekend of the school year. Big party, you're not allowed to hide."

"I can't, I'm totally mortified!" Julie groaned. "Of course he just wanted to hook up, because I'm _that girl." _

"You are not that girl," Connie said. "I don't think he meant it the way you think he did." Julie looked at her. "He's Banksie, in case you didn't notice he's like totally awkward." Julie smiled. "And if he is actually being that big of a dick, don't fall for it this time. Learn from your mistakes Julie The Cat."

"I _really _like him though," Julie sighed. "And I'm not going." She pulled the covers over her head. Connie rolled her eyes.

"Fine," Connie said. "Don't come, and then Adam will see Jen, who is going with the cheerleaders by the way, all looking like you but clean and preppy and whatever, and she'll be all over him because she's _Jen _and he'll be drunk, and then your little sister will be dating the boy you're in love with and you'll just have to live with it." Julie got out of bed and looked in the mirror. "You look fine, let's go. You know how Guy gets pissy when we're late."

* * *

Jen walked carefully into the party with the rest of the freshmen cheerleaders and swallowed seeing Adam walk in.

"I'll be right back," she said to one of the other girls, Cammie.

"That's Adam Banks," Cammie said. Jen nodded. "He's a junior and like really in demand. I live next door to him in Edina. Plus I think he has a girlfriend. He was running with some blonde girl today and they looked really close."

"That's my sister," Jen rolled her eyes. "There's nothing happening there." She bounced over. "Hi Adam." He looked at her. Jen looked so much like Julie. But Jen didn't hate him right now.

"Hey," he said. "How's it going?"

"Good," she said, "I feel like I haven't seen you at all." He nodded. "It was so fun when you visited this summer."

"Yeah, that was a good time," he nodded. "So you're on cheerleading."

"Oh yeah," she said flipping her hair. "It's just something for fun." He nodded. He hadn't noticed it before but Jen was flirting with him. It was clumsy, freshman flirting, but it was still flirting.

"Yeah," he said glancing around. If Julie saw this she would further freak out and he'd have less of a chance of making things OK than he had now. "Um, listen Jen," he said, "have you seen your sister?"

"No," Jen said, suddenly feeling crestfallen. Despite her best efforts clearly Adam just saw her as Julie's little sister. She glanced over at where Dean seemed to be holding court, surrounded by a group of guys that she vaguely recognized from pictures in Julie's bedroom. _He _didn't just see her that way. He'd made it pretty clear in fact that he didn't. "I guess I'll see you around." She headed over in that direction Adam noticed where she was going.

"Whoa, Jen," he said, grabbing her arm. "I wouldn't," he shook his head. Julie had mentioned that Portman was sniffing around Jen.

"Why?" Jen crossed her arms. "Because Julie will get mad?"

"Partly," Adam said, "also he's just not a good guy, OK?" Jen rolled her eyes and walked away. He sighed and then noticed Julie and Connie walk in, with Guy and Russ Tyler. He walked in a straight line over but Julie quickly ducked him and headed toward the keg. Connie looked at him with her arms folded. "She told you?"

"Uh huh," she nodded. He looked at Guy.

"I'm not a part of it," Guy said. "But I'd say that telling a girl you don't want her to be your girlfriend while you have your hands in her pants is probably a bad plan."

"I'm going to agree," Russ said.

"You guys a really helpful," Adam said and walked over. "Julie, come on," he said. "I'm sorry, OK?"

"Sure," she nodded and took a sip of her beer. "Really, forget it Adam, let's just pretend it didn't happen OK?"

"I don't want to pretend it didn't happen!" He exclaimed. She smiled at him indulgently. "Don't give me that look. I taught you that look."

"I don't know what you're talking about," she said. "But I thought about it, and you're right, we could never be a couple. So let's go back to the way things were. It's fine."

"I didn't say any of that," he fumed. "I just, I mean, yeah, I got carried away, and you were right, we should be together," he put his arms around her waist, "for real." She looked up at him and rested her hands on his chest.

"I can't spend another minute wishing things were different," she shook her head. "Adam, I'm sorry, I can't spend this year being shit on again. I did that twice already. I care so much about you. Can't we just, stay friends?" He nodded.

"Yeah," he nodded. "Fine," she nodded and walked away. She noticed Jen, now sitting on Portman's knee drinking a beer. She inhaled deeply through her nose and marched over and grabbed Jen by the elbow.

"Ow!" Jen said. Julie marched her outside. "God! Why are you being such a freak?" She screeched.

"Jennifer, look at me," Julie said. Jen rolled her eyes. "Hate me, whatever, but stay away from Dean."

"Why?" Jen said. "He's hot and he likes me. You're just jealous."

"You have no idea what I'm feeling right now, Jen," Julie shook her head. "None of it is jealousy, go back to school, now." Jen crossed her arms.

"You can't just," Jen started.

"Yes, I can," Julie said, "if you're gonna stay, stay, but stay with the other freshmen cheer skanks," Jen went to talk and Julie walked back into the house and found Portman.

"Hey Kitty Cat," he grinned. She punched him hard in the stomach, he barely flinched but it didn't matter much. He got the message. "OK, Christ, Julie calm down."

"Stay away from my sister!" She raged. He laughed and took her around the waist. "Don't touch me!"

"I like when you get all hot and bothered," he whispered. "Come on, we used to have fun."

"What do you want with Jen, then," she whispered, running her hands over his chest, "just to get be hot and bothered?" He grinned.

"She's sweet," he said, "not like you." She rolled her eyes. "I miss you."

"That's your problem," she said. "If I catch you near Jen again I'll kill you. You are not going to hurt her the way you hurt me."

"Jules, come on," he said as she walked away. She shook her head and then saw Adam.

"No Adam," she said as he stared at her.

"You wanted to start over," he said. "Fine, we'll start over. But a new shoulder to cry on Julie, I'm done."

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**Keep the reviews coming! You guys are the best**


	3. Jen's Choices

**A/N: Thanks for reviewing as always. You guys have been awesome. Keep those reviews coming. This one focuses more on Jen. **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.

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**Chapter 3: Jen's Choices**

Jen sat in her Algebra class staring at the paper. A D? She'd never gotten a D on anything. Thank God it was just a practice test. But there was also a "See Me" note written. She walked up to the desk sheepishly.

"Hi Jen," Mrs. Cayton said. "So," she said. "What's going on?"

"I thought I understood it," Jen mumbled, "I mean, I do all of my homework and everything."

"I know you do," Mrs. Cayton smiled softly. "It's not easy adjusting to high school, and the workload here is heavy, and I know you're on the cheerleading squad and that takes up a lot of time." Jen nodded. "I had your sister when she was a freshman, and I know that grades are really important to your parents." Jen nodded. "Julie did really well in this class, maybe she could help you."

"No," Jen shook her head. Julie had barely spoken to her since the party and that was almost a month before. "I mean, I'll get a tutor, but I'd rather it not be Julie."

"Right," Mrs. Cayton nodded. "Sisters," Jen shrugged. "OK, um, well, do you Adam Banks?" Jen perked up. "He got straight A's, and he's doing pretty well in Pre Calc too."

"I'll talk to Adam," Jen nodded excitedly and rushed from the room. She hurried to Adam's locker. "Hi," she said.

"Um, hey," he said. "What's going on?"

"OK, so I'm bombing in Algebra, and Mrs. Cayton said that maybe you," she said. He looked at her. "I need a tutor, and at first she said Julie, but since Julie's being a weirdo and not talking to me," she said.

"Yeah, join the club," he mumbled. She looked at him. "You want me to tutor you?"

"Please?" She said, turning over her bottom lip and folding her hands. He laughed.

"Fine," he said. "I'll help. I have practice until 4, you do too, right?" She nodded. "So we'll meet in the library at 4:30."

"Thank you!" She said and hugged him. He laughed.

* * *

Julie looked up the hallway and saw them hugging and frowned.

"You don't get to be disapproving," Connie said from the floor where she was filing her nails. "You dumped him, remember?"

"I know," Julie sighed. "But why does it have to be Jen?" Connie looked at her.

"Maybe they bonded over how you won't talk to either of them," Connie said. She glared at her. "Don't get mad at me. What do you want to do for your birthday?"

"I don't know," Julie shrugged. She did know, but it involved a date with Adam. He'd sent her an email saying he wanted to take her out for some really expensive fancy dinner at his parents' country club. Which sort of put the he was too embarrassed to really date her because of her inherent tomboy-ness question to bed. But she still wasn't talking to him, or he wasn't talking to her. She wasn't even sure anymore, but there was no talking happening and there would certainly be no fancy dinner. "Not what I did last year."

"Well, yes," Connie said. "Having sex with Portman in his car and then drinking half a bottle of Raspberry Vodka when he left your party with Kim Trotter and throwing up is terrible way to spend your sixteenth birthday. Do you want to have a party?"

"I guess," Julie slid her backpack on one shoulder. "Whatever you and the guys want to do."

"Well, the guys always want to have a party," Connie said. Julie nodded. "So that's what we'll do. If you make up with Adam maybe we can even have it at his house."

"Maybe," Julie whispered. "I wouldn't count on it."

* * *

Jen sat on her bed in her dorm room sliding a gold chain with a heart pendant on it with the initials _JG _engraved on it. Julie had given it to her for her birthday when she was ten. She was planning on giving it back to her this year for her seventeenth birthday. Mostly because she'd been too busy to shop, but she thought Julie would like it too. She glanced at the clock and then headed down towards the library to meet Adam.

"Hey you," Dean said waiting by the dorm steps.

"Are you like stalking me?" She said. He laughed and shook his head.

"Who said I was here for you?" He grinned. She rolled her eyes. "Where've you been hiding kid?"

"I haven't been hiding," she said, her voice snotty. "Now excuse me, I have to go to the library, to meet Adam." She walked past him. He stared at her.

"_Banks?" _He said. Jen nodded. He shook his head. Clearly, Jen was more intent on driving Julie crazy than he was.

"He's tutoring me in Algebra," Jen said. Dean opened his mouth to say something and then closed it, thinking better of it. "You weren't about to tell me to stay away from him, were you? God, if one more person tells me to stay away from," he looked at her.

"Have people been telling you to stay away from anyone Jenny?" He asked with a shit eating grin.

"You know my sister told me to stay away from you," she stomped her foot. He laughed, she looked really cute, throwing her little fit. "And this week especially."

"Why this week?" He asked. Jen stared at him.

"It's her _birthday_!" Jen said. "I mean, she's a freak and whatever, but I don't want to ruin her birthday." He nodded. "You forgot didn't you?"

"No," he said, she rolled her eyes. "OK, sort of. But will you go to the birthday party that the Ducks are inevitably going to throw her this weekend?"

"Aren't you technically one the Ducks?" She asked.

"Yeah," he nodded. "But not when planning anything regarding Julie. I'm not technically supposed to talk to her during hockey season, or else Charlie will make my life hell." Jen nodded, as if she understood the reason.

"But you do talk to her," Jen said.

"It's worth the hell," he said. "I'll see you." He waved and walked away. Jen walked into the library and found Adam and sat down.

"You look kind of like your dog died." He said. Jen shrugged. "Look, a D on a practice test isn't that big a deal. I know your parents are weird about grades, but this doesn't even count to your average, it's just like a warning."

"I know," she said. "It's not about the grade." Adam looked at her. "Is Julie having a birthday party?"

"Afraid she won't invite you?" He laughed. Jen rolled her eyes. "She's probably having a party. But she won't have much to do with it. The Ducks will take care of everything. They're good like that." Jen nodded and Adam took a sip of water.

"What happened between her and Portman?" She asked. He started coughing and choking. "Sorry."

"Look, Jen," he said. "If Julie hasn't told you, I can't." Jen nodded. "So let's focus on Algebra, it's really not that hard." Jen sat trying to pay attention, but she kept noticing how Adam's hair fell across his forehead, how nice his hands looked holding the pencil and things like that. She actually audibly sighed when he said, "Jen," and shook his head after she got another problem wrong. "You're ready to pack it in now right?"

"No," she said, "I'm just having trouble focusing. You're a really good tutor though." She bit her bottom lip. "So can we do this every day?"

"Sure," he nodded. "Or at least until you have an A. Like I said, I get the parental pressure thing."

"Your parents don't give you spending money or let you go on vacation in the summer if you don't get on the honor roll either?" She said. He laughed.

"My dad doesn't care as much about school as he does my scoring percentage," Adam explained. Jen nodded. "But if my grades slip my mom tends to freak." Jen nodded. "You'll be fine. You should talk to Julie. She's way better at Algebra than I am."

"I think that would probably end badly," Jen grimaced. Adam laughed. She noticed that his eyes kind of sparkled when he laughed. She really wanted to push his hair out of his eyes and she _really _wanted to kiss him. This somehow seemed like a bad idea. She did however, cross and uncross her legs a few times and keep flipping her hair as they talked and packed up their books. Adam couldn't help smiling, that Jen was still trying to flirt with him.

"Listen, Jen," he said, she looked at him. "Do you want to go to Julie's inevitable birthday party?"

"With you?" She said hopefully. He went to say something. "Oh Adam of course! It'll be so fun!" She threw her arms around his neck and hugged him. "I'll see you tomorrow." She bounced away and Adam stood paralyzed. He'd accidentally asked the girl he wanted's little sister out.

* * *

The next day Connie walked over to Adam's locker. He looked at her.

"Hi," she said.

"Um, hi," he said.

"OK look," she said, "I know that you and Julie have weirdness right now, and whatever, but her birthday party this weekend will totally suck if it's at any of the other guy's houses, especially since aren't your parents still at the lake house?"

"Connie," he said. "We can have the party at my house," she smiled. "But um, I kind of did something stupid." Connie raised her eyebrows. "Would it totally ruin Julie's birthday if Jen was there?"

"Not totally," Connie shrugged. "And the guys would be happy, if she brought other freshmen cheerleaders who can't hold their liquor and would make out with them."

"Right," Adam nodded. "Sure, um, but I meant more like, if someone brought her."

"What like Portman?" Connie said. "She might have an aneurism." Adam looked at her. "Adam, did you ask Jen to go with you to Julie's party?"

"No!" He said. "Not on purpose, I was helping her with her homework, and we were talking about the party and then I asked if she wanted to come, to like invite her and the other freshman cheerleaders, because the guys would like it you know?" Connie nodded and crossed her arms. "And then she was all excited and she hugged me and now I'm taking her to the party."

"You can't do that," Connie said. "Not if you want Julie to ever talk to you again." Adam groaned. "Break the date with Jen, then talk to Julie and ask her on a date," he went to talk. "A real date Adam, don't ask her to work out with you again. I don't know how that worked at all, but obviously it was a bad plan."

"She kissed me," he said. "We were gonna have sex."

"You were never gonna have sex," Connie said. "I mean, eventually probably, but not that day." Adam rolled his eyes. "Whatever, she's like in love with you, and you know how fucked up she is, and going out with her sister is just going to make her hate you. Get it together." She walked away. Adam banged his head against his locker.

* * *

Jen sat at breakfast with Cammie and a few of the other freshman cheerleaders, now all dressed in their crisp red uniforms when Adam walked in.

"Her comes your boyfriend Jen," Cammie said sarcastically. Jen giggled and flipped her hair once and waved. Adam swallowed and walked over.

"Hey Jen," he said, "can I talk to you?"

"Sure," she stood up and they walked outside. "What's up?"

"Look about the party," he said softly. She nodded. "Um, we decided to have it at my house, so like it doesn't make a whole lot of sense for us to like go together, because," Jen looked hurt and confused. "I'm really sorry, but still come, OK? And bring Cammie, or the other girls, or any one you want. I'd really like to see you there."

"Sure," Jen nodded. "Yeah, I'll see you there." She walked away and then saw Portman. He did say she could bring anyone he wanted. And when she was with Portman people seemed to have strong reactions. She walked over to him. He looked at her. "Hi," she said.

"She initiates conversation?" He said with that same knowing grin he always had.

"Yeah," she said and flipped her hair. "Listen, um, are you going to my sister's birthday party on Saturday?" He looked at her. He'd briefly considered going to Julie's party. Last year Julie's birthday party had been a good night for him.

"Maybe," he shrugged. "I don't know, why?"

"Well, I figured we could go," she batted her eyelashes, "I mean together," he looked at her.

"I think I'd like that." He smiled. She nodded and walked away. He smiled and sat down with Julie who was sitting by herself holding a book up.

"Go away," she said monotone. He started peeling his orange and she looked at him. "Seriously Dean, I have to read this, I don't have time."

"I just had a very interesting experience," he said, ignoring her request to leave. She rolled her eyes and put the book down. "I just got invited to your birthday party."

"Good for you," she said. "I'd stay away from me, because you're not ruining my birthday again."

"Don't you want to know who invited me?" He asked. She sighed.

"I don't know," she said. "Fulton?"

"Jen," he said. She looked at him. "It was sort of cute really, she just came up to me and asked if I wanted to go with her." Julie exhaled.

"Fine," she said, "go with her. But I know how you get when girls don't put out, and I doubt Jen will." He looked at her. "Oh she'll tease, until she gets what she wants, but she's way too much of a good girl to let you get far past first base." She picked up her tray and marched out. He frowned. This plan was not working at all the way he hoped.

* * *

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	4. Happy Birthday Julie

**A/N: SO sorry I haven't updated in like forever! I was in a wedding in another state, hence no computer, hence no updates. But I'm back now! YAY!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing

* * *

**

**Chapter 4: Happy Birthday Julie**

"I thought you didn't want Portman to be with Jen," Connie said as she and Julie got ready for Julie's party that Saturday.

"No, I figured it out," Julie said. "It's better this way, see, Portman will take her to the party, and then he'll try to put his hand in her bra and she'll pull her whole prissy Daddy's girl thing, and he'll get pissed, and she'll never talk to him again."

"So," Connie said. "You want your little sister to get molested by your exboyfriend so that they never talk to each other again?"

"That is the general plan yes," Julie said. "Do I look OK?" Connie looked at her friend. Julie was wearing a pair of skinny jeans and an oversized V-neck tee shirt that slid off of her shoulders. She looked amazing.

"Yeah, you look OK," Connie said. "Come on Birthday Girl," she pushed her out the door.

* * *

Jen walked carefully down the steps of the freshman dorm seeing Dean standing by his car, which was not at all what she thought the first car that she would be going on her first real high school date would be like. Dean looked up at her. Jen was wearing a pink linen sundress, and matching ballet flats. Her hair was perfectly blown out and styled, he'd barely noticed how it was cut shorter in the front to frame her sweet little face before. He'd really just looked at how similar to Julie she looked, but now, he was seeing that Jen was really beautiful totally on her own. She did look a lot like her sister, but she also had green eyes, not blue, and her nose was longer, and her build much smaller, but that was probably because cheerleading made a girl substantially less bulky than hockey did.

"Hi," Jen said with a smile.

"Hey," he said trying to get some level of cool going. "You look beautiful."

"Oh, right, thanks," she said as he opened the car door. They sat in the car and he turned music on and she started fiddling with the wrapped necklace.

"What's that?" Portman asked. Jen looked at him.

"Oh, um, it's just a present for Julie," Jen shrugged. "It's stupid, it's this necklace that she gave me when we were little, I thought I lost it like right after and I was really upset. I cried a lot and then this summer while I was packing, I found it. I thought that maybe she'd think it was kind of funny." Portman looked at her. He'd never heard her talk that much. "What did you get her?"

"I uh," he swallowed. He hadn't gotten her anything. He had sort of planned on his present being that he wouldn't suggest they go upstairs and get naked. "I didn't get her anything."

"Oh," Jen said. "No wonder she dumped you then." He laughed.

"I don't think my lack of gift giving had much to do with it," he said. Jen looked at him.

"Well then why?" She asked. He looked at her and shook his head.

"It's a really long story," he sighed. "The short version of which is I'm an idiot, and she likes someone else."

"I don't think she likes someone else," Jen said. He looked at her. "I mean, if she did she wouldn't get so freaked out every time we talk." He smiled.

"I think that's more because she hates me," he said, "and less because she likes me."

* * *

Julie walked quietly around the Banks's happily accepting birthday greetings and trying to avoid seeing Jen and Dean sitting laughing together. She walked into the kitchen and saw Adam going through the fridge.

"Hi," she said. He turned and looked at her.

"Hey," he nodded. She smiled softly. "Having fun?"

"Sure," she nodded and propped herself up on the counter. He looked at her. "Thanks, you know, for letting us have the party." He looked at her.

"No problem," he said. "I liked my plan better." She blushed and smiled.

"I didn't hate that plan either," she said. He nodded and walked over and slid his hands through her hair. "Adam," she whispered.

"Julie," he said softly. He inched closer when Jen walked in and he bounced backwards. Julie exhaled and popped off the counter. "Hey Jen," Adam said casually, "I should go make sure that no one broke anything." Julie looked at her sister.

"Um, I wanted to give you a present," Jen said softly. Julie smiled. Jen looked very pretty. "Here," she handed her the box.

"Jenny, you didn't have to," Julie said.

"Whatever, Jules, it's your birthday," Jen shrugged as Julie opened the paper and saw the necklace.

"Oh shut up!" Julie laughed and Jen smiled. "You found it?"

"While I was packing," Jen explained.

"God, you cried so much when you thought you lost it," Julie laughed. Jen blushed.

"Well, it was while you were in LA," Jen said. "I thought you would hate me when you got home. Then you did anyway but it wasn't because of the necklace." Julie looked at her.

"Jen, I don't hate you!" Julie said. "You're my sister, I love you." Jen shrugged. "So are you and Dean having fun?"

"I guess," Jen said. "Aren't you going to yell at me and tell me to stay away from him?"

"Nope," Julie shook her head. "Obviously that didn't work. Have a good time." She slid the necklace around her neck and tucked it into her shirt. She walked outside and took a deep breath sitting on the front steps. She was grateful for Jen's gift, and for her not being weird for once. But it had cost her what could have been a turning point with Adam.

"Hey you," Dean said and sat down. She looked at him.

"Please don't," she whispered. "I'm actually having a good time tonight." He nodded. "Jen said she's having fun," she said.

"Jen is fun," he nodded. Julie laughed. "She's not you though."

"I said don't," she said softly.

"Sorry, I just," he sighed. "Look, I miss you, OK?" She bit her bottom lip. She did miss Dean, well, parts of Dean. She definitely missed kissing him, and the way it felt when his hands pressed against the backs of her thighs when she straddled him. But she didn't miss crying everytime she found him kissing a cheerleader, or doing more, as had been the case with Kim Trotter, or the way unless they were alone together he completely ignored her.

"You've said that," she said flatly. He looked at her. What else did she want? "I have to go, Dean," she stood up.

"Jules, wait," he said, and took her hand and pulled her close, she looked up at him, "Happy Birthday, babe." She lost herself as he kissed her deeply.

_

* * *

Dean grinned as he and Julie sat in his car. She smiled and kissed him. _

"_I got you a present." He said softly._

"_You did?" She whispered. They'd been hooking up for a month and she was living for the scraps of attention he threw to her. She was sure it was because Dean was shy, or not in touch with his feelings that they weren't really together._

"_Of course," he said. He handed over a small box. She frowned. Jewelry? Did he know her at all? She wasn't a jewelry girl. Then she opened it and giggled. It was actually a roll of athletic tape. "You were out, and whining about it at practice."_

"_You're such an idiot," she rolled her eyes and climbed on top of him. He grinned and grabbed the back of her thighs. "Luckily, you're hot, so that'll make up for it." He laughed and they kissed hard, their hands fumbled at their midsections to undo their flies. He pushed her jeans down around her thighs and her panties after that. She groaned as he touched inside of her. After a few minutes of that he pressed her underneath him and pushed himself into her. "Ooh," she whimpered._

"_You like it?" He growled into her ear. "I know you do."_

"_Oh God," she whimpered, "best, birthday, ever," she panted as he thrust into her over and over again._

"_Happy Birthday, babe," he mumbled and pulled her close by the thighs.

* * *

_

Julie came to her senses and pushed him away.

"No," she shook her head.

"What?" He raised his eyebrows. "I didn't think you knew that word." She rolled her eyes and walked inside. "Come on, Julie," he groaned, "what's the point, babe? We both know you're going to come back!"

"No, I'm not!" Julie said. "Why don't you just give it up? I don't love you anymore Dean." She marched into the house. Jen looked over from the circle she was standing in and was then surprised when Dean walked over.

"Do you want to get out of here?" He asked her.

"Um, OK," Jen said softly, "but Julie looks really," he looked at her.

"Do you want to go or not Jen?" He said shortly. "I'm leaving, now."

"Fine, go then," she crossed her arms. "I don't care." He looked at her. "I'm not ready to go yet, I'll get another ride." He stared at her.

"But I thought that," he said, "I mean, I figured we'd,"

"You gave me a ride so, I'd give you one?" She said with a snort. "What-_ever,_" she laughed and walked into the kitchen to get a beer. She downed it and then had another and another. After a while she slumped against a door frame.

"Whoa!" Adam said seeing her slide down. "Jen, come on," he picked her up. She cooed and curled her head against his chest. "How much did you drink, kid?"

"Not much," she giggled and he nodded and walked her into the guest room.

"Sleep it off," he said. "I won't tell Julie."

"Adam," she said and took his hand. "Stay, please?" He sighed and lay down with her. "Adam?"

"Jen," he teased, he couldn't help himself.

"Do you think I'm pretty?" She asked. He smiled.

"Yes," he nodded, "I happen to think you're very pretty."

"Who's prettier, me or Julie?" She mumbled.

"Well," he said, "you're both really pretty, but it's different." He realized he was probably a little drunk too. "You're all soft and, and Julie's," he sighed, "Julie's amazing."

"Are you in love with her?" She whispered, clearly about to fall asleep.

"I think so," he whispered.

"Could you maybe love me too?" She asked. He looked at her.

"Jen," he said softly, wanting to let her down gently, but not sure how to. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him. Too tired and drunk to do anything else, he rested his hands in the small of her back and kissed her back.

* * *

Jen woke up in the morning with her head resting on Adam's chest. She smiled. She'd kissed boys before, during spin the bottle and seven minutes in heaven and that kind of thing, but she'd never been just kissed the way Adam had the night before.

Adam smiled, not opening his eyes. He'd dreamed that Julie had slept in his arms all night. And when he did open his eyes and saw the blonde head curled into his chest, he smiled. Maybe he hadn't been dreaming. Then he looked down and noticed the blonde's clothes, and then the little face looking up at him, smiling. It wasn't Julie at all. It was Jen.

"Good morning," Jen whispered and kissed him.

"Um, good morning," he mumbled. "Jen, um," he swallowed.

"Last night was so amazing," she cooed. "I knew you felt the same way as I did!" She kissed him again. She pressed her tongue out but he kept his lips closed. "What's wrong?" She asked. "Why won't you kiss me back?"

"Jen," he said and stood up. If he wasn't lying down she couldn't kiss him again. "What happened last night wasn't," he sighed and looked at her. "You're great, OK? You're funny and beautiful," she nodded. "Jen I'm in love with your sister. You know that, I told you that yesterday."

"But then why," she said, her eyes getting big.

"Because we were drunk," he said sharply, "because we were lying in bed together and I like you, and you kissed me, and you look a lot like her. That's why it happened. It doesn't mean anything." He turned around and walked out. Jen swallowed and hugged her knees to her chest for a moment to try not to cry. Once she got it together she walked downstairs and saw Adam talking to Julie, outside. They were clearly fighting about something, not something, she knew what they were fighting about they were fighting about her. Julie turned around and stormed away, Jen slipped out and into the morning air and walked to a bus stop where she saw her sister standing with her arms crossed.

"Julie?" Jen said carefully. Julie looked at her.

"Don't talk to me for a while, Jen," Julie whispered, when the bus pulled up she stepped on and walked to the back. Jen stayed in the front. They didn't talk.

* * *

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	5. Date Night

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews you guys! I appreciate it. Keep them coming**

**Disclaimer:**

A few weeks later, on a Friday, Julie opened her locker and sighed seeing a note from Adam pinned inside.

_I'm sorry. Again. Please forgive me. I miss you._

She tore it off and crumpled it up. She was too mad to deal with it at the moment. She wasn't even mad that they'd hooked up. Not anymore. At first she had been, but she knew that she had no right. She'd renounced any claim on Adam when she walked away at the party the first week of school. But she was mostly upset that Adam could do to Jen what Dean had done to her all the time. It wasn't as extreme, but Jen was totally heartbroken. Jen hadn't even really been kissed before, as far as Julie knew, which made Saturday night, like a huge deal. But a tiny part of her brain was just jealous. Just plain old jealousy that Jen had gotten to spend a night, however chaste and drunken it was, in Adam's arms, where she so desperately wanted to be. She walked over to the library and sat down at a table where Jen was sitting, chattering with her friend Cammie. Since the Adam fallout Julie had taken up the slack as Jen's algebra tutor. Jen turned immediately sullen and Julie sighed.

"Do you have your homework?" Julie said. Jen nodded and handed over the paper. "Hi Cammie."

"Hi Julie," Cammie said. "Jen, I'm going to go get a cup of coffee." Cammie stood up and walked away.

"She's nice," Julie said. Jen nodded. "Jen, look I'm sorry, OK?"

'No, you're not," Jen whispered. Julie looked at her. Jen sniffed. "You're not sorry, Julie. He loves you and he doesn't care about me, and you're not sorry. Is my homework OK?"

"It's fine," Julie said softly. "Every problem's right. I think you're past whatever your block was."

"Good," Jen said. "I'm going to breakfast." She shoved her books into her backpack and marched away. Julie sighed and banged her head against the table and then took out her physics book. She had a test that she knew she needed to review for.

"I thought you'd be in here," Adam said sliding in next to her. She glared at him. "You can't ignore me forever. Eventually, Charlie is going to have a meltdown about how we're not communicating on the ice."

"Charlie needs to stop thinking he can control things that have nothing to do with hockey," she said. "And I'm not going to ignore you forever, just until I can look at you without feeling sick to my stomach."

"Julie," he took her hand. She tried to pull away, really she did. "I was upset, about you. You're the one I want. I don't care about Jen!"

"Adam don't you see that's the whole problem?" She whispered. He looked at her. "You do care about her, you like her, and that's fine. But at least admit it!"

"But I," he started. She looked at him. "Fine, OK? I like her, I think she's kind of adorable, and she's always throwing herself at me, which is sort of flattering, I guess, and when I asked her out, even though it was an accident, she hugged me and told me how excited she was, she didn't delete the email and never really answer me!"

"When you asked her," she stuttered, "you asked her out?" Adam's eyes got big, he forgot he hadn't shared that detail with Julie yet.

"No," he said, "it was a misunderstanding! I was inviting her to the party and she thought I was asking her out." She stared at him and started laughing, he looked back at her and then he started laughing. "What exactly is so funny?" She kissed him.

"Well, that's just so," she said, "of course you asked my sister out by accident, because you were being nice." He looked at her. "You're a nice guy," they kissed again. "That doesn't explain why you made out with her though." He kissed her.

"There's only one girl I want to make out with," he whispered. "Go out with me tonight." She swallowed. "Please baby?"

"OK," she nodded. "But I'm not wearing a dress." He laughed and they kissed again.

* * *

Portman sat in the cafeteria watching Jen sit with her friends. She was smiling and laughing but it looked kind of forced. He realized that he'd been noticing her a lot. Which wasn't the plan. The plan was flirt with Jen, drive Julie nuts, get Julie back. That was the plan. And he had to stick to that. Except that Jen had rejected him. He didn't get rejected that often, not by girls. It was intriguing, and a little irresistible. And he couldn't get her out of his head.

"Hey you," Kim Trotter bounced over, wearing her cheerleading uniform. She sat down next to him.

"Hey Kim," he said lightly. He'd been avoiding Kim. She was a distraction. And he couldn't be distracted from the plan.

"I thought I'd see you," she said. "I mean, I figured you wouldn't go to Julie Gaffney's party, since you two aren't together anymore." He looked at her.

"Yeah," he nodded, "I went to the party. Her uh, her sister asked me."

"Jen?" Kim laughed. "Oh God, she is so cute isn't she? Freshmen are just adorable!" He nodded. "Listen, are you busy tonight."

"Uh, I might be," he said and stood up seeing Jen leave her table and head into the hallway. "Hey! Jen!" He shouted after her. She glanced over her shoulder saw it was him and kept walking. He jogged to catch her. "Come on," he said. "Why are you pissed at me?"

"Are you serious?" She gaped at him. "You just left!"

"You asked me to," he said. She rolled her eyes.

"Boys," she mumbled. He sighed and took a deep breath.

"OK," he said. "Look, I'm sorry, alright?" She crossed her arms. "I shouldn't have assumed that anything was going to happen between us. I just," he sighed. "I had a really good time at that party with you. And I can't stop thinking about you, and I was wondering if you wanted to go out tonight. See a movie or something."

"Go out with you?" She said. He nodded. "No strings attached?"

"Nope," he shrugged. "I mean, I wouldn't hate kissing you or anything." She laughed. She had to fight the memory that this brought up of Adam's hands moving gently up and down her back while their lips moved together. Then she noticed Julie and Adam walking into the main building holding hands and her face flushed.

"Fine," she said. "I'll go out with you." She marched away. He grinned and then he saw Julie and Banks.

"Of course," he mumbled.

* * *

Julie collapsed against Adam's bed as he kissed her. They'd gone out to dinner and then somehow ended up here. She didn't much care. It felt so good. She spread her legs and put her hands over her head and he moved his up her arms.

"You smell nice," he whispered and kissed her neck. She giggled and then whimpered when they kissed again. He hesitated his hands skimming the hem of her tee shirt.

"It's OK," she said softly. "I want to," he pulled her shirt over her head. She bit her bottom lip and looked up at him, he was looking at her kind of funny. "What?"

"I love you," he said. She blinked.

"What?" she whispered.

"I love you," he repeated. They kissed deeply. "You don't have to say it back or anything, but I do. I always have."

"Always?" She swallowed. He nodded. "Like, always, always?"

"Yeah," he nodded. "Well, maybe it took until the end of that first practice," he shrugged. "But pretty much always," she swallowed and sat up crossing her legs. "She's sitting up."

"We have to talk about this," she said. He sighed.

"Why?" He said. "Do you feel the same way?"

"Of course I do!" She said. "I love you, but I didn't know you felt that way, like all of last year and everything."

"Julie," he laughed. "Do you really think that if we were just friends, I'd have been there for you like that? I was in love with you and I just kept hoping that one day you'd wake up, and realize I'm the guy for you." She smiled.

"That's exactly what happened," she whispered and kissed him. "That's why I broke it off, with Dean."

"I thought it was because you caught him fucking Kim Trotter?" He raised his eyebrows.

"Well, that too," she said. "I mean, he always said he fooled around with other girls, but I was the only one he had sex with." Adam nodded. "But it was mostly that I wasn't in love with him anymore. I was in love with you." They kissed again. "I _am_ in love with you." He smiled. "Do we have to do this tonight?" He looked at her. He knew what she was talking about.

"You're blue balling me again Cat?" He raised his eyebrows. She giggled. "Of course we don't. But don't run away this time. You might change your mind. Let's go downstairs and watch a movie or something." She laughed and found her tee shirt.

* * *

Jen and Portman walked down the street in front of a movie theatre.

"You seriously want to see this?" He asked pointing to the theater when they got there. It was showing the original _Clash of The Titans. _"If we went to the mall we could see some new romantic comedy or something." From his understanding, that was what girls like Jen wanted to do on dates.

"Have you _seen _this movie?" Jen said earnestly. He shook his head. "It's awful, and it's so fun."

"I don't really watch shitty movies," he shrugged. She looked at him. "Your sister made me watch _Plan 9 From Outerspace _once."

"Ugh," Jen rolled her eyes, "yeah, that's her favorite. _Clash of The Titans _is way better but not quite as good as _Reefer Madness."_

"I see," he said. "And are you an expert on this?" She grinned.

"Daddy used to make us watch Mystery Science Theater 3000," she explained. "The mentality stuck. We Gaffney's love us some sarcasm."

"I've caught on to that too," he grinned. She giggled and bounced over to the ticket window. "Let me," he took out his wallet. She smiled.

"OK," she said. "I'll go get popcorn." She really didn't want this to get too "datey," after all, she liked someone else entirely, and he was clearly still into Julie. She walked into the theater and got popcorn and sodas. He followed her in with the ticket and they sat in the dark for two hours. Jen was right, the movie was awful, but hilarious. She giggled a lot, he liked the sound. After they walked for a while.

"That movie was awful," he said. She laughed. "Really, awful."

"I know," she nodded. "That's the point." He smiled they wandered into a park and then sat down on the swings.

"So what happened to you?" He asked. She looked at him. "I mean, you've been sad lately."

"What have you been like watching me?" She asked. He nodded. "God, creepy much?" He smiled.

"Watching might be the wrong word," he said, "noticing is a better one. I notice you." She nodded and pumped her legs. "It's just, when school started you were really light, now you seem heavier." _More like Julie. _The thought raced through his head. She started pumping. "So you're not going to answer."

"I'll tell you what happened to make me sad if you tell me what happened between you and my sister," she shrugged. He smiled.

"You drive a hard bargain Jenny," he said standing up and grabbing the chains her swing to stop her. "So, you want to know what happened?"

"Why does she hate you so much?" She asked. He sighed.

"OK, so," he said. "You remember Scooter?" She nodded. "When that prick dumped her out of the blue," Jen looked at him. She'd liked Scooter, she knew that things ended with him and Julie before he went off to college, but she didn't know the specifics, she knew Julie was really upset about it, and that she spent most of that summer running around with kids from the public school back home getting into trouble. "She was different, after, liked taking risks, I was into that," he sighed. "I think I was one of the risks actually. We had fun," Jen looked at him. "And then we didn't anymore. So I found other fun."

"Kim?" Jen asked. He nodded.

"Kim, and a few other girls," he shrugged. "Julie got fed up and dumped me." She looked at him.

"That's it?" She asked.

"That's it," he shrugged. "Your turn." She bit her bottom lip.

"At Julie's party, I got drunk," she said. "And Adam helped me, and we were talking, and well, we made out a little, and then he said that it didn't matter because he's in love with Julie." He looked at her. "It's stupid I guess, but I thought he liked me," she looked at the ground. "No one had ever kissed me like that, you know? So I couldn't believe that it didn't mean anything. But I guess it didn't. He loves her, you know? And why wouldn't he?" Dean looked at her. "She's cool, and funny, and she always says the right thing," she looked at him.

"How did he kiss you?" He whispered, still kind of shocked. Perfect Adam Banks had blown off _this girl? _ She looked at him. "Was it like this?" He took her face in his hands and kissed her softly. She was surprised but it felt really nice. Her whole body tingled.

"No," she said. "Not like that," she was teasing him, mostly she wanted him to try kissing her different ways. It felt so good.

"Not like that," he nodded. "What about this?" He gently opened his mouth and kissed just her bottom lip. She whimpered and put her hands around his neck and stood up, opening her mouth carefully. He tangled his hands in her long blond hair and pressed her body to his. This felt way too good to stop.

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	6. What Really Happened

**A/N: Thanks for reviewing! Hope you like the chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing

* * *

**

**Chapter 6: What Really Happened**

Jen walked to the football field in her uniform, with the rest of the freshmen cheerleaders.

"Jenny," she heard a whisper and then giggled separating from the group and running under the bleachers where Dean was standing.

"Hi," she said.

"Hey," he smiled and she walked over and kissed him. He put his hands on her waist. "Mm," he grunted and pushed her away. "Oh God you look hot in that thing."

"Do you want to look at me, or do you want to kiss me some more?" She whined. He grinned. He never should have kissed her to begin with. It was like a drug, one that he had to take secretly and frequently. And he often wanted to do a lot more than kiss her when she got excited and started rubbing her little body against his. But it couldn't be more than kissing. He didn't do the deflowering thing. He pushed her against a pillar and put her arms above her head and kissed her.

"Oh," she whimpered as he kissed her neck. "That feels so good." It felt amazing when Dean kissed her. But she'd learned already that it was just physical it didn't mean he cared about her or anything. That's why she wouldn't let anyone find out about it. She'd mentioned the date to Cammie who had responded that while certain of her sister's group were OK to date, like Adam, or Charlie Conway or someone like that, but others, like Dean, or his friend Fulton Reed, or basically any of the others were not. This seemed odd to Jen, since she knew half of the upper classmen girls had hooked up with Dean. Including Kim, who was still all over him anytime she saw him. She pushed herself up and wrapped her legs around him. He let himself go for a minute and ran his hand up her thigh. She whimpered and started grinding into him. He was so hot and this felt so good. There could be worse things than losing her virginity right now.

"Jen," he whispered and put her down. "You should go."

"No," she said, "I want to," she kissed him again.

"No you don't," he said. She looked at him, and started seething. "You don't want me, Jen. You've made that pretty clear."

"I haven't heard you complain," she crossed her arms. "And I don't care that you don't want me either." She put her hands on his chest. "We do look a lot alike, Dean, you can even call me Julie, if that would make it easier for you."

"Don't be a bitch," he shook his head and pushed her away. "So what are you more afraid of," he asked. "What Kim and Cammie will say if they saw you with me, or Julie's wrath that you're with her ex boyfriend, or how her current boyfriend will react seeing you don't worship the ground he walks on anymore? Except that you really do."

"Oh God, you don't know anything!" She marched away. He shook his head. This was a problem.

* * *

Meanwhile Julie lay in her dorm bed completely and utterly satisfied. Adam lay next to her with a pleased look on his face. Julie giggled. They always got that look after. She rolled over and kissed him.

"That was amazing," he said. She giggled.

"Was I worth waiting for?" She asked. He nodded. "Good," she smiled. They kissed. "Adam," she whispered, tracing her finger across his chest.

"Mm," he said softly.

"In my experience," she whispered, "this is the part where the guy gets weird and bolts." He looked at her.

"I'm not going anywhere," he whispered. "Unless you're there too," he hugged her close. She nodded.

"I love you," she said. He smiled. He smiled every time she said it.

"But?" He said. She laughed.

"No but," she shook her head. "I just do." He nodded. "There's something I have to tell you."

"OK," he said and she turned over and kissed him. "What's up?" She swallowed.

"I um," she said, "I didn't tell you everything about when things went bad with me and Dean." He looked at her.

"I was around for most of it," he said. She shook her head.

"Not the worst stuff," she whispered. "No one was," she bit her bottom lip. "Not even him."

_

* * *

Julie sat quietly at a spot out in the woods behind the school. There was blanket laid out. She and Dean met here often enough that she knew he'd show eventually. She wiped her eyes a few times. She was terrified. He strode into clearing._

_"Hey babe," he sat down and kissed her neck. "I'm sorry about this morning."_

"_It's OK," she said. "I just really need to talk to you." He looked at her. "I um," she said._

"_Look," he said, "I know that things have kind of sucked with us lately, and you've been really cool about it."_

"_Dean," she managed to choke, "I missed my period." He looked at her. _

"_What's makes you sure it's mine?" He said. She looked at him. "I mean, if you even are."_

"_I haven't slept with anyone else since us," she said. "I-I," she stuttered trying not cry, "I love you, I thought," he stood up._

"_I can't deal with this," he shook his head, "I'm sorry Jules." He walked away. She burst into tears._

* * *

Adam looked at her.

"Why didn't you tell me?" He asked. "Then?"

"I didn't tell anyone," she swallowed. "I was embarrassed and scared." He kissed her. "I wasn't, obviously, when I went to tell him, that's when I found him with Kim."

"I'm sorry that you went through that," he said. She shrugged. "I promise, Julie, I will never hurt you." She smiled.

"You say that now." She mumbled.

"I mean it," he said firmly. "I won't." She nodded and looked at the clock.

"Oh shit!" She shouted and jumped up, pulling her jeans and then her boots on.

"What's wrong?" He said.

"Football game," she mumbled, "I have watch Jen." He sighed.

"Why?" He asked. She looked over her shoulder at him.

"She's my sister," she said.

"She hates you," he said. "She hates me, she hates us."

"Can you blame her?" She shook her head. "I love you," she kissed him, "but us getting together was really insensitive to her. I'm just trying to make it up." They kissed each other. "Come with me."

"That will make it worse," he said. She nodded. "I'll see you later." She stood up and headed up to the football field. She stopped in her tracks as she walked through the bleachers and saw Dean and Jen. Her face flushed and got worse as she saw Jen march away. Once Jen was gone she walked over to him.

"What's up?" He asked. She stared at him. "Ah, I'm supposed to read your mind."

"What are you doing with my sister?" She asked. He looked at her.

"We're just having some fun," he shrugged. "Relax, Cat, it's PG rated fun."

"Keep your hands off of her," she said, her hand clutched around the strap of her bag. He looked at her.

"Are you jealous?" He asked. She swallowed. "What's it like with Banks?"

"Don't talk about him!" She shook her head. "You have no right to,"

"Do you ever wonder Julie?" He asked, "does it ever pop into your head, while he's kissing you that he'd rather be with someone else?" She looked at him.

"Is that why you do it?" She asked. "When you're with Jen, do you think about me?" He grinned.

"I don't need to," he said. "Jen's fine just on her own. You have no idea how easy it is, her uniform, those little skirts and dresses, makes a nice change from the jeans and cargos."

"I thought you didn't like virgins," she said, "too many emotional complications."

"Yeah," he said, "but the fooling around without you know that, has it's benefits. No um, messy aftermath," he whispered. She looked down.

"So does Jen know?" She asked. He looked at her. "Did you tell her everything?"

"You weren't pregnant Julie!" He hissed. She looked at him.

"Yeah," she nodded, "I'm aware, but see, most guys, when the girl they're screwing thinks she's pregnant, at least sticks around for the test before he goes and fucks a cheerleader." He looked at her.

"I was scared." He said.

"So was I!" She said. "I was terrified, and you blew me off." He looked at her. "I didn't expect anything from you except to be there for me."

"I woulda been there," he said firmly, "if you had been, I would have been there. I'm not a deadbeat Julie," he put his hands around her face. He kissed her softly. She whimpered and put her arms around his neck and they pressed close to each other.

"Oh, God," she groaned as he moved to her neck. "What about Jen?" She asked.

"What about her?" He whispered. "It's you, Jules, it's always been you." They kissed again for a while.

"I can't," she pushed away. He looked at her. "I loved you so much and you just didn't care!"

"That's bullshit!" He shouted. "You know it is!" She shook her head. "You knew how I felt, Julie." She shook her head.

"No," she said. "I thought I did, but if you cared at all you wouldn't have treated me like that." He looked down. "And I can't do this to Adam." He swallowed. "Or to Jen."

"I think they'd get over it," he mumbled.

"Either you're a sociopath," she grinned, "or you're really sprung on her." He rolled his eyes.

"Whatever babe," he laughed coldly. She walked over and smelled his neck.

"Oh come on," she said, grinding him a little. "Don't you think about it ever? Jen's soft little body, wriggling under you, 'Oh Dean,'" she whimpered, "'don't stop, it's so good. I never imagined it would feel so good.'" He looked at her and swallowed. "I have to go." She walked away and up into the stands. She crossed and uncrossed her legs a few times. She was telling herself that she was still hot from making love to Adam for the first time. It had nothing to do with the way that Dean was kissing her, or the way she teasing him.

* * *

After the game Dean walked over to Jen who was standing with Cammie, who rolled her eyes. Jen looked at him.

"Can we talk?" He asked. Jen nodded and they walked away. "I changed my mind."

"About?" She raised her eyebrows.

"Us," he said. "Fulton's not around tonight, you wanna hang?" She looked at him.

"Yeah," she nodded. "I'll see you later."

"Can't wait," he kissed her softly.

* * *

That night Jen got ready. She didn't know a whole lot about sex, but since she'd decided that she wanted to lose her virginity to Dean, she'd been buying fancy underwear. She slid one of her slinkier dresses over her head, tousled her hair a bit and walked into the hallway. She noticed Julie walking out of the bathroom and sighed.

"Jen," Julie walked over to her. "Where are you going?"

"It's none of your business," Jen said. Julie sighed as Jen walked past her.

"I know about you and Dean," Julie said. Jen turned around. "Don't do this Jen. You'll regret it."

"I won't," Jen shook her head. Julie sighed.

"He's just using you," Julie said.

"Not everything is about you," Jen said. "Dean likes me, and he makes me feel good." Julie sighed. "And at least he trusts me enough to tell me what happened between you two."

"He told you?" Julie said. Jen nodded.

"Yeah," she said. "And you know just because he cheated on you, doesn't mean he'll do the same to me." Julie looked at her sister. There's no way Dean had told her everything. Even Jen wasn't that evil. "I'll see you later."

"I thought I was pregnant," Julie spit out as Jen walked away. Jen turned around. "When Dean slept with Kim," Jen swallowed, "I'd told him, earlier that week that I thought I was pregnant, and I had just found out that I wasn't and I was going to tell him and he was with her."

"You're lying," Jen said. "You're just jealous and you don't want,"

"Jen," Julie said. "Look at me," Jen looked at her. "I'm not jealous, I just don't want you to get hurt."

"You should have thought of that before," Jen whispered. Julie looked at her and she turned around and walked away.

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	7. Things Fall Apart

**A/N: Keep reviewing I appreciate it!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing

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**Chapter 7: Things Fall Apart**

Dean looked around the room. He'd picked up the messes and even spraid some air freshener. He wouldn't have bothered for most hookups, but it was Jen's first time, he didn't want he thinking back on it with memories of the smell of his gym socks. Plus he did like her. He smiled when there was a knock on the door. He opened it and Jen was standing there sheepishly.

"You look beautiful," he whispered and kissed her, pulling her inside. She tried to ignore the voice in her head as they kissed and closed the door. They fell back against the bed and she whimpered as his hand rode up her thigh and tugged at her underpants. They were off in a matter of seconds. He touched inside of her gently. She whimpered. "You're soft," he whispered.

"Dean," she groaned. "That's," he kept going. "Oh," she'd never felt like this. He kissed her chest.

"Do you like it?" He asked. She groaned. "That's yes," he laughed.

"Dean," she whispered as he kissed her neck. "Dean, wait," she put her hands against his chest.

"What's wrong?" He said. "I've got condoms, if that's what you're worried about. I mean, I've never done this." She looked at him, "I mean, you're my first virgin." He stopped. "That sounded really skeezy, huh?"

"Did Julie have a pregnancy scare last year?" Jen asked. He looked at her.

"What?" He said and sat up. She looked at him.

"When you two were together," she sat up, "did Julie have a pregnancy scare?" He swallowed.

"Yeah," he whispered, "yeah, she did." She looked at him.

"Why didn't you tell me?" She asked. He looked at her and sighed. "I mean, I asked you what happened between you guys, that's like a huge detail to leave out."

"She wasn't pregnant!" He said standing up. "You know? I mean, yeah it was a weird fucking couple of days. But it was nothing!"

"You thought she was," she said. He looked at her. "And then you slept with someone else."

"I know," he said.

"Are you just with me because you know it will make her jealous?" She said, her eyes filling up with tears.

"Jenny," he whispered, "no, it's not like that." She looked at him. "I really like you." She wiped her eyes. "Please don't cry," he sat down and wiped her tears away. "Please," he kissed her. She whimpered. "We were having good time right?" She nodded. "OK, so," he kissed her. "Where were we?" She kissed him and lay down.

"Do you think you could ever love me?" She asked. He looked at her.

"I know I could," he answered truthfully. They further undressed each other. She looked at his naked body above her. "Are you sure?" He whispered in her ear. "I don't want you to unless you're sure."

"I'm sure," she whispered and kissed him. "I want to." He leaned over to the nightstand and switched off the light and then pressed into her. "Oh, Dean!"

* * *

Julie sat across a restaurant table from Adam jiggling her foot. He looked at her.

"Julie," he said, she looked at him. "Relax, OK?"

"She's having sex with him," she said. "I mean," he sighed. "She's fourteen."

"You were fourteen," he pointed out.

"I didn't lose my virginity out of spite!" She said.

"Yes you did," he said. She looked at him. "You slept with a football player because you got into a fight with Scooter." She crossed her arms. "At least she knows his name."

"I knew his name," Julie grumbled. "It was Boone, or Burke or something." Adam laughed. "I knew it at the time." She looked at him. "When your first time?"

"Summer after freshman year," he shrugged. "Up at the lake, her name was Clara, she was a lifeguard." Julie started laughing. "Cliché right?"

"Kinda," she nodded.

"So, Boone, or Burke," he said, "and then Scooter, and Portman, and me?"

"There was a guy in Bangor between Scooter and Portman," she said. He nodded. "And so, Clara, and Bea Valdez last year at homecoming,"

"Gemma Walker," he said. She cocked her head. "The daughter of one of my parents friends, we took tennis lessons together. She goes to Blake."

"I see," she said. "They liked her didn't they?" He smiled.

"Yeah," he nodded. "They did more than I did."

"But you had sex with her," she said. "I've never had sex with someone I didn't even like."

"I didn't say I didn't like her," he laughed, "I just said my parents like her better than I did." She nodded. "They'll like you too," he leaned across to kiss her. "They just don't know you. That's why I want to take you to dinner with them."

"At the club," she raised her eyes. He nodded.

"Their turf," he said, "make them feel at ease." She said. "They know how I feel about you. I mean, my dad's intense and everything but my parents want me to be happy." She smiled. "And, when your parents come to see a game and make sure that Jen hasn't fallen into the seventh circle of hell under your influence, we'll go out to dinner with them, and then this will be real."

"Yeah," she said, "except for Jen, it'll be my fault." He looked at her.

"It's not though," he said. "You tried to protect her Julie. But she's gonna make her own mistakes." Julie nodded. "I feel guilty too," she looked at him. "I led her on."

"I know," she shrugged. He looked at her. "Adam, you did. I'm not arguing the point with you."

"Sometimes I wish you were at least a little bit like other girls," he shook his head.

"I keep you guessing," she grinned. He laughed.

* * *

Jen and Dean lay in bed, her head rested on his chest. He wrapped his arms around her waist.

"You want to stay?" He asked. She looked at him. He kissed her, he hadn't slept with, like actually slept with a girl since Julie, but he didn't want to send Jen packing.

"I don't have anything to sleep in," she said.

"I think we can find something," he stretched and stood up, pulling his boxers on. He went into his dresser and grabbed a tee shirt and then put it back.

"What's wrong?" Jen asked.

"Just, not that one," he pulled another and tossed it to her. She nodded.

* * *

"_The Cubs suck," Julie said, pulling his teeshirt over her head._

"_So don't wear the shirt," he shrugged, "I'd prefer you didn't." She rolled her eyes._

"_Your team got cursed by a goat," she kissed him. "That's terrible."_

"_And trading the greatest player ever," he clicked his tongue, "that's not at all pathetic."_

"_It's a goat, Portman," she straddled him and kissed him, "it eats tin cans." He laughed. "However, being cursed by the greatest player to ever play the game is seriously bad ass." They kissed. _

"_You are crazy hot," he whispered as she kissed his neck. "Even for a Red Sox fan." She giggled and rolled over so Julie was on her back._

* * *

"Ew," Jen looked down at the shirt.

"Is there a problem?" He raised his eyebrows and crawled over.

"Well," she shrugged, "no, but The Bears?" He groaned. "I always thought that I'd sleep a nice Pats fan the first time."

"You like football?" He said.

"I like Tom Brady," she grinned. He kissed her neck. "Dean," she mumbled.

"Mm," he whispered and pulled her close.

"Was I alright?" She looked at him. He pushed her hair off her face. "I mean, I know you've been with lots of girls, and,"

"Lots would be an exaggeration," he said. "There have been a few though, yeah," she looked at him anxiously. "You were great," he kissed her. "And either you already know how to put on a show, or I didn't suck either."

"You did not suck," she said yawning. "I've never felt like this."

"Me neither," he whispered. Why was it so easy with Jen? He could say things out loud that he'd never said before. He'd thought them with Julie, but he could never say them. She curled her arms around his waist and fell asleep. He kissed her forehead and she snuggled closer. "I'm falling in love with you." He said, once he knew she was fast asleep and couldn't hear it. He'd never said that out loud, not even about Julie, who he'd been pretty sure it was true with.

* * *

Julie took a deep breath the next morning and knocked on Jen's door. She had donuts and two Nestle Quik's in her hand, one chocolate (for Jen) and one strawberry (for her). A peace offering. Cammie opened the door.

"Uh hi," Cammie said.

"Hey," Julie sighed, "is Jen awake?" Cammie bit her bottom lip.

"She didn't come in last night," Cammie said. "She didn't pick up her phone either, I was kinda worried."

"Oh," Julie whispered, "well, when she gets back can you give her this." She held out the chocolate. "She'll know what it means."

"Sure," Cammie nodded. Julie looked at her. "She's really jealous of you, you know?"

"Because of Adam?" Julie asked. Cammie snorted.

"You're joking right?" Cammie said. "Because of everything. I think she thinks you're like the coolest person ever."

"Jen _Gaffney?" _Julie asked. Cammie nodded. "I'm pretty sure you're mistaken."

"I'm pretty sure I'm not," Cammie said. "Anyway, I'll give her the Quik, see you." Julie nodded and walked away and Cammie closed the door. Julie walked down into the sunshine and fresh air and closed her eyes. Jen hadn't come back to her room. Which meant that she'd probably done it. That was sickening enough, but the thought that she'd spent the night. For all of his pointless hooking up she knew that she was the only girl that he let sleep over, that hurt her pride a little. Hadn't he just said, well, not said exactly, but implied, that he was still in love with her?

"Hey," Adam walked over. "How did it go?" She shrugged. "Not good?"

"She wasn't there," Julie said blankly. He looked at her. "Kiss me?"

"I don't," he said softly. She grabbed onto his shirt and kissed him. He swallowed and pulled her close. She felt flushed and hot and wonderful and all of those good things. No, it had just been a physical glitch yesterday it was just residual attraction. She loved Adam, and just Adam. "Wow," he whispered. "What are you feeling guilty about?"

"Um," she said. "I told you yesterday about how I found Jen and Portman." He nodded. "I didn't tell you that after he and I sort of," he looked at her.

"Did you have sex with him?" He asked.

"No!" She said. "God, no, we just made out, a little. It wasn't a big deal." He raised his eyebrows.

"I've seen the way you two make out," he said. "Remember."

"Adam it was just kissing," she said, "It's really not a big deal."

"We'd just had sex for the first time," he said, "and then you made out with him. That's not nothing!" She swallowed. "Do you still have feelings for him?" She looked at him.

"I love you," she said. "Why are you being such a girl?"

"Why won't you just answer the question?" He asked.

"I don't know, OK?" She sighed and hugged her knees. "I thought I was over him, I really did, but I just don't know anymore."

"So all that stuff about how you wanted to protect Jen," he said. "That was just bullshit?"

"No!" She shook her head. "No, of course I was worried about Jen, Adam, it's not anything."

"I'll find you later," he shook his head.

"Adam!" She said and stood up going after him. "You're reading too much into this!"

"Am I?" He said. "You're not over him!"

"But I love you," she said. "Isn't that all that matters?"

"No, Julie it's not all that matters," he said. She sighed. "Because yeah, this time you just made out with him, but I know how you get, especially with him." She crossed her arm.

"I'm not going to have sex with him Adam!" She dropped her jaw.

* * *

Jen woke up and rolled over, Dean wasn't in bed. She frowned and sat up and then noticed a note stuck on the wall.

_Woke up, took a shower, wanted to let you sleep. There's juice in the mini fridge. Be back soon._

Jen smiled and stood up walking over to the minifridge, pulling her underpants on. She leaned down and searched through for a bottle of water when the door opened.

"Portman, dude, you should have seen this chick last night," Fulton Reed groaned and then saw her. "Oh hey Jules, God, I'm glad you two got your shit together, if I had to listen to him outline his plan one more time," Jen stood up and turned around. "Uh," he said, "um, hi."

"What plan?" Jen asked.

"Sorry, I," he said, "we haven't actually met. You're Jen right?" Dean walked in.

"Hey Fult," he put his arm around her and kissed her. "Morning Jen."

"Morning," she whispered. "What was your plan?" Dean looked at her.

"Um," he said. "What are you talking about?"

"I'm sorry dude," Fulton grimaced, "I just saw the hair and she was here and I figured she was the Cat, I didn't," Jen stared at Dean.

"Jen, it's not what you think OK?" He said. "It was before I really knew you, I just thought that I'd make your sister jealous." She gaped at him. "I don't care about that anymore, though! I care about you." She grabbed her dress and pulled it on.

"I can't believe I had sex with you," she whispered and ran out.

"Jenny, wait, come on," he went after her.

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	8. Move Past It

**A/N: I'm sorry that it took so long to update. I've been really busy with school, and then my computer crashed, and a million other excuses. But here's the next chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing

* * *

Chapter 8: Move Past It  
**

Jen hurriedly packed up her bag after cheerleading practice. It had been three weeks since that night in Dean's room and she was kind of surprised how little had changed. Cammie pointed out that that probably meant Dean had kept it to himself, because there wasn't a line of seniors asking her out, like the other girls who it had gotten around put out. Julie had said little on the subject, but seemed more focused on the fact the Adam broke up with her. Normally Jen would have taken pleasure in Julie's mad mood, but this was different, and Julie was being so nice and helping her with her homework and everything.

"Jen," Kim walked over to her. Jen smiled lightly at her captain. "Look, my parents are going away this weekend," Jen nodded. "I'm having a party, you'll be there right?"

"Absolutely," Jen said.

"Cool," Kim smiled, "um, this is kind of awkward. Are you and Dean Portman a couple?" Jen froze.

"No, we are not a couple," Jen said.

"OK," Kim said, "that's good to know." Jen nodded. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Sure," Jen muttered and walked outside. Kim wanted to know if it was OK for her to hit on Dean. The thought of it made Jen's skin crawl. Less because of what Dean did to her, and more because the last time Dean had sex with Kim, Julie was waiting for the results to a pregnancy test. She wondered if Kim knew. Probably not.

"Hey," Cammie walked over. Jen smiled at her. "Are you going to Kim's thing this weekend?"

"Probably," Jen nodded. Cammie nodded too. "Why?"

"Um, are your sisters friends going to be there?" Cammie asked biting her nails. Jen looked at her.

"Why? Which one do you like?" Jen asked. It did baffle her a little bit that Julie's friends were actually cool here. Not like upper level popular, but cool enough that it wasn't totally socially destructive to date one.

"Luis Mendoza told me he thought I was pretty," Cammie blushed and giggled. Jen rolled her eyes.

"I thought that we agreed we were only going to date other freshmen," Jen said softly.

"Um, no," Cammie said, "you said you were only going to date guys in our grade and I said that was a good idea, for you, because of the whole Dean Portman thing. But I never agreed to anything."

"Ugh, whatever," Jen rolled her eyes, "Luis only said you were pretty because you were drunk and he thought you'd go down on him. Adam told me." She marched away.

* * *

Julie walked into the gym and quickly put her headphones in to avoid conversation. Both Adam and Dean were working out too. She got onto the treadmill and took a deep breath. She started it going and ran for a while when Dean walked over. He motioned for her to take her headphones off and she did, sheepishly.

"We need to talk," he said simply.

"This really isn't the place for it," she said, noticing Adam trying not to stare. Dean frowned. "OK, fine, talk, what's up?" He took a deep breath.

"I need you to talk to your sister for me," he said really fast.

"Run that by me again?" She raised her eyebrows and stopped the treadmill. She grabbed a towel and dried her neck. Dean sighed.

"I need you to talk to Jen," he explained. She started laughing and took a sip of her water bottle. "Cat, come on, please?"

"You think I'm going to talk to my sister to help you get into her pants again?" She shook her head. "You're high aren't you?"

"It's not about that," he insisted, "I really liked her OK?"

"Of course you did," Julie sighed. "Look, Jen's kind of devastated."

"I know, I shouldn't have," he sighed. "I want to apologize, and explain."

"Explain?" Julie said. "How about you explain to me why six hours after you said you were still in love with me you seduced my fourteen year old sister?" He swallowed. "Explain that."

"I don't think I can," he shook his head. "I mean, look Cat, when I'm with you, I'm thinking about you, and us, and all of it, the good, the bad and the ugly," she nodded, there had been plenty of all three, "but then when I was with Jen it was like," he looked down, "like I got to start over, and do it right this time."

"Oh," she said. "That's a pretty good explanation." He smiled. "I'll talk to Jen, I guess, but I doubt she'll listen to me, and if she asks my opinion, I'm still telling her that it's a bad idea."

"Fine," he nodded. "So what's up with you and Banks?" She shook her head.

"I screwed it up," she sighed.

"Me?" He grimaced.

"A little," she shrugged, "but it was me too. I should go stretch or whatever." She walked away.

* * *

Adam stood watching them talk, and when Julie laughed a part of him lurched. This was ridiculous. He was over her. He knew he was over her. He had even gone out on a date with another girl and everything. So why was he still jealous that Julie was talking to Portman? As she walked away from Portman he stopped her.

"Hey," he said.

"Oh, um hey," she nodded.

"So um," he took a deep breath, "good work out?"

"I didn't really work out yet," she said. He nodded. "Adam, are you," she swallowed. "Are you going to that party this weekend?"

"At Kim's?" He asked. She nodded. "I don't know, I," he swallowed, "I was thinking about it. Why, are you?"

"Maybe," she said, "I mean if there isn't anything else going on." He nodded. "Adam, I'm really sorry, about…"

"Don't worry about it," he shrugged. "I was being stupid and stubborn." She nodded. "I miss you, like a lot."

"I miss you too," she said. "So then, if you haven't committed to Kim's party, do you want to maybe hang out."

"Julie, I don't know if," he sighed, "I mean, I miss you but,"

"Adam, I meant we should see a movie and drink hot possibly caffeinated beverages," she shrugged. "I wasn't talking about getting naked. Obviously we're not ready for that part, given what happened last time."

"I thought it went pretty well," he frowned. "Oh you mean the breaking up right after part?" She nodded. "That was bad." She laughed.

"Yeah," she said softly, "I should go finish my run." He pulled her close and kissed her softly.

"Hey!" Charlie shouted, "stop that and start working! Jeez, I expect having to break Connie and Guy up, but not you two!" Julie giggled.

"We should work out," Adam nodded, "that vein in Charlie's head is starting to really pop." She laughed.

* * *

Julie sighed and knocked on Jen and Cammie's door. Cammie opened it.

"Hi," Julie said simply, "is Jen here?"

"Nope," Cammie said shortly.

"Do you know where she is?" Julie asked.

"Not clue," Cammie shook her head. "See you." She closed the door Julie frowned. That was odd, normally Cammie and Jen were inseparable.

* * *

Jen sat out back and wiped her eyes. She knew she shouldn't have lashed out at Cammie. Adam walked past her and stopped and then noticed her and walked over.

"Hey," he said. She whipped her eyes again.

"Hi," she mumbled.

"Are you alright?" He asked. She nodded. "That was convincing." He sat down with her.

"Adam, please go away," she said. He looked at her.

"Jen, look, I know things are weird right now," he said. She looked at him. "But if you need someone to talk to, I'm around." She nodded.

"I had sex with Dean," she said. He nodded.

"I figured that out," he said. She swallowed. "Julie and I broke up."

"I figured that out too," she said. "I'm sorry, I mean, if it had anything to do with me."

"It didn't," he said, "not really. It was a lot of things." She nodded. "She worries about you, you know," Jen snorted. "She does. I mean, she loves you and she just wants you to be happy." Jen looked at him.

"Did you even like me?" She asked. He looked at her. "Or were you just being nice?"

"No I liked you," he said. She smiled. "But not as much as you liked me, and I led you on, and I shouldn't have." She nodded. "I'm sorry."

"It's OK," she said. "I sort of projected a lot too." He smiled. "Are you and Julie going to try again?" Adam looked at her. "You should, once things heal. She loves you." He looked at her.

"How do you know that?" He asked. Jen shrugged.

"I know my sister," Jen said. "She's different around you." Adam smiled. "And since you broke up she's been really mean."

"I see," he nodded. "Thanks for the tip." He looked down. They sat quietly for another minute and Jen started to cry again. "Hey," he said softly and wiped her eyes. "Don't cry, everything's going to be OK." He hugged her.

Julie walked past them and frowned, steadying herself and walked over.

"Hi," she croaked. Adam and Jen pulled apart. "Adam, can I talk to my sister please?" He nodded.

"Sure," he squeezed Jen lightly, and walked away, leaning to kiss Julie on the cheek but she flinched away. "I'll talk to you later I guess." Jen swallowed and looked at her sister.

"Jules, I swear, it wasn't what it looked like," Jen exclaimed, "we were just talking!"

"It's none of my business," Julie shrugged. "I um, I'm sorry, for how I've been acting. It was selfish and," Jen looked at her. "I was just trying to protect you."

"I know that," Jen said. "Now," Julie smiled sadly. "I just was hoping for once that something could be about me. And it wasn't."

"What do you mean?" Julie sat down. "It's always about you." Jen snorted. "It's true, you're the perfect daughter, and you're popular and beautiful, and," Jen laughed and shook her head.

"Julie, you basically left home when you were thirteen, after the Goodwill Games," she whispered. "And they were so proud of you. And they were always bragging." Julie looked at her. "And so I had to just keep trying harder, and it just started to feel like I was always chasing you."

"The grass is always greener, huh?" Julie smiled. Jen nodded. "Portman asked me to talk to you." Jen looked at her.

"Really?" Jen said. Julie nodded. "Why?"

"He claims he really likes you and wants to start fresh," Julie shrugged. Jen nodded. "Look, he seemed sincere, and I know him well enough to know when he's dicking around, but," she took a deep breath, "and this is a big but," Jen nodded again. "I still don't think it's a good idea for you to be with him. Especially given what you just said about feeling like you're always chasing me." Jen laughed.

"So you don't think I should talk to him?" Jen said. Julie shrugged.

"I think you need to make that decision," Julie said. "I mean, he had some good things to say when I talked to him. I definitely recommend waiting a little more before you have sex with him again, like four, five years or something." Jen laughed.

"You don't think he's good for me?" She asked. Julie shook her head.

"No, I don't," she said, "but I think you might be good for him. I've seen him with other girls Jen, and he's never been this distracted when one of them gets pissed at him. Not even me." Jen laughed. "Just do what you think is right." Jen nodded.

"So are you and Adam, like whatever?" Jen said. Julie shrugged.

"We're going to hang out this weekend," she said. "We'll see how it goes. I mean, it's hard." She was quiet. "Dean and I hooked up," Jen looked at her. "The day that Adam broke up with me and you and Dean, you know," Jen looked at her. "I'm not telling you this to warn you off, or anything like that. We didn't have sex, we just made out, hard, and he basically told me he was still in love with me." Jen closed her eyes. "I just thought you should know. I don't think he did it to be a dick. I think he's confused."

"Are you?" Jen asked. Julie smiled.

"Not anymore," she said. "I want to be with Adam. There's too much messiness with Dean. Maybe if we'd done things differently last year, but we didn't." Jen nodded. "So what's with Cammie, does she have her period or something?"

"No," Jen sighed, "She said something about liking Luis and I basically told her he just wanted to hook up with her when she was drunk."

"He probably does," Julie shrugged. "She's a girl and she's been drunk. That would be Luis's type." Jen laughed. "I feel like the world is upside down, your friends want to hook up with my friends." Jen laughed.

"Yeah, how do you think I feel?" Jen raised her eyebrows. "My sister's weirdo group is like the coolest kids in school here." Julie laughed.

* * *

**Please Review! I'll try to update more frequently!**


	9. Only You

**A/N: Thanks as always for reviewing! Told you I was back!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing

* * *

Chapter 9: Only You  
**

Julie and Adam sat quietly in a coffee shop, both sipping it carefully. They were both feeling very awkward.

"So," he said, "um, the other day."

"Adam, I don't want to talk about it," Julie shook her head. He raised his eyebrows. "Jen told me you guys were just talking, and I believe her." He looked at her. "I thought we wanted to start over? Forget about all that crap from the past few months."

"Julie," he said, "I really care about you, but," she groaned. "No, it's not like that, I just don't believe that that's possible. Forgetting about all of that crap, I mean, especially the stuff with Jen."

"What stuff?" She laughed. "Oh, but can you start tutoring her again, for the first time since we were like toddlers Jen and I aren't fighting, I want to keep it that way."

"Uh, sure," he nodded. "You're kind of freaking me out." She sighed.

"Why?" She asked her eyes narrowing.

"That's better." He nodded. She laughed. "So, can we talk about it so that it's all out of the way?" She nodded.

"Sure," she said. "What exactly do you want to talk about?"

"Did you have sex with him?" He asked.

"No," she shook her head. "I didn't. I told you that." He nodded. "You thought I lied."

"Kind of," he said.

"OK, my turn," she said, "if we hadn't," she swallowed, "if you thought I didn't love you back, would you be with her?" He looked at her.

"Probably," he said. She nodded. "But you do love me back."

"Yeah," she smiled. "I do." She stopped. "I'm always going to love him, Adam, a part of me is always going to be his. It definitely sucks, but it's something I have to know that you're OK with."

"I don't know that I can be OK with that," he said. She nodded. "I'll try though." She smiled and kissed him softly. "We're back up to PDA?"

"Shut up," she shook her head and kissed him again. "So are you my boyfriend again?"

"If you want to be my girlfriend again?" He smiled. She nodded. "Good, so then, when are we doing the whole, dinner with my parents thing?" She laughed and rolled her eyes.

"I don't know," she shook her head, "maybe next week, my parents are coming up to make sure that Jen's not dead or whatever, we could do both at once." Then she stopped. "Or not."

"Why not?" He asked. It actually sounded like a good idea to him.

"Because I don't want," she bit her lip, "Jen would have to be there."

"Oh," he nodded. "Yeah, I guess that's a problem." He could hear his mother after meeting both Gaffney sisters talking about how Jen was "exactly the kind of girl he should be dating." "Then we'll do it another time, but we are going to. I want everyone to know how important to me you are." She smiled.

"OK," she nodded.

* * *

Portman stood quietly at Kim's party watching the door. He was confused. Jen's friend Cammie had come in, but Jen was nowhere to be found. Ordinarily the two of them were inseparable. Then a few minutes later Jen walked through the door. The room stopped, or it seemed like it. Jen had that power, everyone watched her. She walked over to him.

"Hi," she said confidently.

"Hi," he smiled.

"Can we talk later?" She asked. He nodded. "OK, cool." She walked away and over to Cammie, who immediately turned to start walking away. "Cammie, wait," she said. Cammie stopped and turned to look at her. "I'm sorry, about what I said, and how I've been acting."

"Whatever," Cammie said.

"So can we be friends again?" Jen asked. Cammie shrugged.

"I guess so," she said. "But try not to be such a bitch all the time." Jen laughed and the two girls hugged. "So are you going to talk to Dean?"

"Yes," Jen nodded, "but just talk. I think," Cammie laughed.

"Sure," Cammie said. "Well, good luck with your just talking then." Jen nodded and walked over to Dean.

"Hi," he said.

"Hi," she said softly, "can we go outside?" He nodded and they walked out back to the deck. She shivered once.

"Here," he slid his jacket off and around her shoulders.

"Thanks," she muttered. "Um, so," he smiled his soft crooked smile.

"So," he said. "You called this meeting."

"Not really," she shrugged, "you told Julie you wanted to talk." He smiled.

"She said she was going to tell you it was a bad idea," he said. She nodded. "Which is a guaranteed way to get you to talk to me. She's smart." Jen laughed. "So, here we are."

"You wanted to explain," she said softly. He nodded.

"Yeah," he said, "um, I really like you Jen, and what I said that night, that I could love you, I think I really could." She nodded.

"I think I could love you too," she said, "but you need to get over Julie." He looked at her. "And I can't be with you while you're doing that, because I'll always just be wondering if you're looking at me and seeing her." He pushed her hair off of her face. "Please don't," she said.

"I can't help it," he said. "There's something here Jen."

"I know that," she said. "But I'm fourteen! I'm not ready for that. It's scary! And you're amazing, and I have so much fun with you but then we," she looked down.

"Yeah," he said, "that was wrong." She looked at him. "I knew it was. Maybe we can just start over or something?"

"You don't get to erase that kind of thing," she said. He nodded. "I'm not sorry it happened." He looked at her. This girl was completely and utterly bizarre. "I'm not. It'll make me strong. But, I am glad that you didn't tell a lot of people." He laughed.

"It wouldn't have looked great for me either," he said. She nodded. "Plus I'm not that kind of guy. Shit spreads on it's own, there's no reason to spread it yourself." She hugged him around the waist. "Jenny," he whispered.

"Just hold on for a little bit," she said. "I like it when you hold me." He smiled.

"I like it too." He said. They stood quietly holding on to each other.

* * *

**Late August: One Year Later**

Julie sighed and laid on the horn in her car, Jen sighed and looked at her sister who then pointed at her watch. Jen sighed again and returned her attention to the boy she'd been kissing.

"I still don't understand," he said, "if your school doesn't start for two more weeks, why do you have to go now?"

"Oh, well," Jen giggled, "Julie's really anxious to get back to her boyfriend, and my parents don't want her driving by herself."

"What do they think she'll set the car on fire or something?" He snorted. Jen frowned. "Sorry, I know she's your sister, but, she's just so intense."

"I had a lot of fun this summer Jared," she smiled at him and kissed him again.

"Me too," he said, "I'll email you."

"You're so sweet," Jen batted her eyes. Julie lay on the horn again. "I should go." She kissed him softly and walked away. "You could have just let me say goodbye without ruining everything." She said getting into the car.

"Please," Julie rolled her eyes. "Yesterday you were saying that you don't even like him that much. Plus I'm not the one who has to be at school two weeks early for cheer camp." Jen rolled her eyes.

"No, you're the one who volunteered to drive me so that you can hang out with Adam more," Jen rolled her eyes, "like you two didn't see enough of each other this summer? He was here for a month and then you were there."

"Yes, Jen," Julie nodded, "and if you someday date a boy whose company you actually enjoy, and isn't just a nice chest in a polo shirt, you might understand the desire to spend time with him." Jen nodded and bit her thumbnail. She'd tried to like Jared, and all of the other boys that she'd met and gone on dates with this summer, but they were all so, well, safe. None of them saw her the way…not that that mattered. "Earth to Jen?" Jen looked at her sister who laughed. "Where'd you go just now?"

"Nowhere," Jen said. "And I do like Jared. He's very sweet." Julie nodded. She knew what Jen was thinking. Jen didn't want sweet anymore. Her sister had changed. A year ago a boy like Jared would have beyond satisfied every desire Jen had. But not anymore. Jen didn't even look the same. To the untrained eye, maybe she did, but she'd cut her silky blond hair into stylish short layers. Her clothes were still preppy, but had a more worn in edge to them, she was much more likely to throw on a pair of jeans when heading out the door than she used to be, and most of all she tended to drift off. Julie knew where she went when she did this.

"You know," Julie said, "Portman's in Minneapolis," Jen looked at her. "He stayed with Fulton for the summer, they worked at the mall."

"Interesting," Jen said. "And I care why?" Julie grinned and rolled her eyes. "I don't still have feelings for him."

"Of course not," Julie laughed. Jen glared at her.

"I don't!" Jen said. "I mean, that was such a long time ago." She flipped her hair. Julie nodded. So she wasn't completely different. "I hadn't even thought about him until you just brought him up."

"If you say so," Julie nodded. "Anyway, when I saw him he was being distinctly less douchey. So that's a plus."

"Julie, none of this matters," Jen said. "I'm totally over him, can we talk about anything else?"

"Sure," Julie nodded. "Hey, did you have sex with Jared?"

"God, don't be gross!" Jen said. Julie looked at her. "And no, I didn't. I'm not you, I don't have sex with everybody who's ever paid attention to me."

"I haven't had sex with everybody who's ever paid attention to me," Julie gaped at her.

"Uh, OK," Jen rolled her eyes. "That football player you did it with the first time, Scooter, that Paul guy the summer you broke up with Scooter, Dean, and then Adam?"

"Well, when you list them," Julie grumbled. Jen smiled.

"Point Jen," she said.

* * *

Portman stood tossing a ball up in the air at the booth at the amusement park in the Mall of America where he and Fulton had been working all summer. It was just him at the moment and things were very slow.

"Hey," he dropped the ball when he saw Adam Banks walk up.

"Hi," he said. "Can I help you with something?"

"We need to talk," Adam said. Portman snorted. "I'm serious."

"Clearly," Dean said. "What's to talk about?"

"Julie's on her way out," Adam said, "she'll be here tomorrow night."

"OK," Portman nodded. "What does this have to do with me?" Adam looked at him. "Dude, come on, it's literally been two years. I'm past it." He stared him down. "She's not coming alone is she?"

"No," Adam shook his head. "She's not." Dean sighed. "Look, I just thought I'd let you know." Adam turned and walked away.

"Are you ready for it?" He asked. Adam turned around and looked at him. "I'm not the only one who's seen the appeal of both."

"I'm not into Jen," Adam shook his head. "I never really was. Just thought you'd want to know she was back in town."

"Thanks for the heads up," he nodded. "Anything else?"

"Nope," Adam shook his head. "See you around." He walked away. Portman frowned. For the rest of the day every time he saw a blonde girl he craned his neck. It was never her.

* * *

Jen sat in her and Cammie's room looking through a scrapbook. Cammie looked at her.

"So," she said, "do you want to go look for him?" Jen looked at her. "Well?"

"No!" Jen said. "God, stalker much?"

"I just thought that maybe," Cammie shrugged, "I mean, you look hot."

"You're as bad as Julie," Jen said. Cammie looked at her. "I do look hot, but it can wait until school starts."

"Ugh, you're so lame," Cammie rolled her eyes. "Aren't you at all curious how he looks?" Jen bit her bottom lip. She'd pictured him a million times. She didn't want the perfect Dean in her head to be corrupted by seeing the real thing. But Cammie couldn't know that.

* * *

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	10. Reunited

**A/N: First off, I want to let almica2 know that I swear I'm not ripping you off, I had this chapter planned for a while, (great minds I guess.) Just so happens that we published around the same time. Thanks for reviewing!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing

* * *

Chapter 10: Reunited  
**

Julie smiled lying on Adam's bed when he walked in.

"Hey," she said. He smiled. "Where were you?"

"Out," he shrugged. "When'd you get here?"

"About an hour ago," she said. "Your sister let me in. Why isn't she back at school?"

"She leaves tomorrow," he plopped on the bed and kissed her. "Hello."

"Hello," she smiled. "So, out where?" He looked at her.

"Um, just around, with the guys, whatever," he said. "You look so hot." He kissed her and she pushed him away.

"Nice try," she said. "Where were you?" He sighed. "Adam," she said cautiously. "Please don't tell me you were where I think you were?"

"Look, I just thought he should know that Jen was going to be around," he shrugged. She looked at him. "You, and Jen, you and Jen, and that he should stay away."

"That's between him and Jen," she said, "it has nothing to do with you and me." He sighed. "Please let's not do this again this year. Can't we just enjoy senior year, and be together?" He smiled.

"I love you," he said.

"I love you too," she said. "But please stay out of anything involving my sister. Jen and I managed to get along really well this summer by staying out of each other's business." They kissed again. She couldn't say the real reason she didn't want Adam interfering in Jen's life. She really didn't want to admit it, even to herself. She didn't trust Jen and Adam around each other. "Mm," she whimpered as his hand slipped up her shirt, "wait," she said.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"Do you think I'm a slut?" She asked. He raised his eyebrows. "Or I guess, I was, before, before us?"

"Where is this coming from?" He asked. She looked at him. "Jules, come on, I never thought that!"

"Jen does," she whispered. He looked at her. "What? I'm not allowed to be upset that my sister thinks I'm a slut?"

"No, you're allowed to be upset I just don't see Jen ever saying that," he said.

"She didn't, exactly," Julie shook her head. He nodded. "Besides, you don't know Jen as well as you think you do." He looked at her. "She shows off for you." He laughed.

"I think that because she's your little sister," he said, "you just see her a certain way. She's always going to be the snotty little kid who took over your bedroom." Julie laughed. "She's not, Jen's funny, and smart, and pretty cool, if you get past the whole little brat thing she does to protect herself." She looked at him, and the way he was smiling. She sat up.

"Did you talk to her this summer?" She asked. He looked at her. "I mean, not just when you were at my house and we were eating dinner or whatever?"

"I don't really understand the question," he said. She looked at him. "I mean, she called me a few times, once that guy she was dating tried something, she told him no," Julie stared at him. "Anyway, she said it was no big deal, but she needed to talk to someone."

"So she called you?" Julie said. Adam nodded. "When was this?"

"Early June," he shrugged, "right before you came out here."

"Why didn't you tell me sooner?" She asked. He looked at her. "Right, she asked you not to. Why did she call you though? Not me or Cammie?"

"Come on, Cat," he said, "would you go to Cammie with that kind of thing?" Julie laughed. "And she didn't want you to and I quote, 'remove the guys scrotum or something over nothing.'" Julie frowned.

"He didn't," she swallowed, "I mean, he didn't finish."

"Not that she told me," he said. "Anyway, that Jared guy was there and stopped him, or intervened or something that's why she kept going out with him."

"Oh," she said softly.

* * *

Jen took a deep breath, standing in front of the house. She'd never been to Fulton Reed's, but she'd found the address. She knocked on the door and Fulton answered it.

"Hi," she said.

"Hi," he nodded.

"Is he here?" She asked. He nodded.

"Portman," he yelled. "Package for you." He winked at Jen who smiled softly. Portman walked out. "I'll leave you to it."

"What are you doing here?" He asked. She swallowed. "Jenny," he said.

"I guess I just had to see you," she whispered. He nodded.

"Great," he said. "Now you've seen me." She shoved her hands in her pockets. "I like your hair." She laughed.

"It's taken some getting used to," she touched the ends.

"Banks came to see me at work today," he said. She stared at him. "Told me you'd be back in town."

"Cheer camp," she explained. He nodded. "Why'd you decide to stay in town?"

"Got a job here," he shrugged, "Fulton's parents are pretty cool." She nodded.

"How's Kim?" She asked.

"Fine," he shrugged, "I mean, I think, I haven't heard from her much. She's at college and all."

"Sure," she whispered. He looked closely at her and took a step closer. He ran his hand down her arm and she shivered, "Dean, don't."

"What happened to you?" He asked. She looked at him.

"Nothing, it's," she said, "it's nothing." He looked at her.

"Don't bullshit me," he said. She looked up at him and pulled away.

"What do you think because a year ago I let you," she shook her head, "you don't know me Dean Portman!"

"I didn't mean it like that!" He said. "I just," he looked at her. "Jesus Christ Jen, you've just never been this jumpy, and you cut your hair, and you're dressed like your sister." She looked at him.

"Whatever," she said, "this was a bad idea, I'll see you around." She turned around and started walking towards the bus stop. He went after her.

"Jenny," he said catching her, "come on, you don't have to explain anything, I'm sorry." She hugged him. "I missed you. Even just, seeing you, knowing you were around."

"You too," she said. "So much." He held her close and she felt safe and at ease.

"Come in," he said, "like I said, Fulton's parents are cool. We can talk or," she kissed him. "Or do some of that."

"I'm not the same girl I was last year," she said simply.

"Look the same," he cupped her face, "except for the hair and the jeans," she laughed, "same laugh," he kissed her, "taste the same. By everything I can figure, you're the same girl." She smiled. "Come inside."

"I can't, I have to get back," she said, he looked at her. "Cammie doesn't know that I'm here, she'll ask questions." She kissed him again. "I'll see you." The bus pulled up and she walked on. He smiled and watched her. He walked back to the house and then inside. He plopped on the couch next to Fulton.

"What did Jen want?" Fulton asked.

"I'm not sure," Portman said softly.

* * *

"I mean, why did she call him?" Julie said. Connie groaned and pressed a pillow to her face.

"Julie," Connie said. "I beg of you, please let this go! Jen's fine right? You said she's fine?" Julie nodded. "And Adam didn't cheat on you, or lie to you?" Julie nodded again. "So then what's the problem?" Julie plopped on Connie's bed.

"I don't trust them," she admitted. Connie looked at her. "I know, I suck! I don't trust my boyfriend and my sister, but I mean,"

"They did hook up," Connie shrugged. "And they are kind of,"

"Perfect for each other," Julie mumbled. "You don't have to keep saying it." Connie looked at her.

"I wasn't going to," Connie said, "I was going to say that they're trying, and they've been trying." Julie sighed. "Actually, I mean, it makes a lot of sense that she didn't talk to Cammie about it." Julie looked at her friend.

"Really?" She said. Connie nodded. "That's what Adam said too, why?"

"Because Cammie's sort of," Connie sighed, "I mean, you saw her at prom with Luis." Julie smiled. "And you get nuts when it comes to your sister, everyone knows it, so that's why she didn't go to you. It makes sense that she'd go to Adam, she trusts him." Julie nodded. "And you need to."

"I know," Julie groaned. "I suck."

* * *

Jen walked into the dorm and sat down on her bed. Cammie looked at her.

"Where did you disappear to?" Cammie asked. Jen looked at her.

"Nowhere," Jen said.

"Jen, you're being really weird," Cammie said. Jen looked at her. "And I mean, we're supposed to be best friends," Jen looked at her.

"I went to see Dean," Jen said softly. Cammie looked at her. "Just to see him, talk to him whatever. You'd do the same thing if Luis were here."

"No," Cammie said, "I wouldn't, because I would tell you!" She looked at her. "And Luis actually you know, called me this summer, a few times." Jen looked at her. "And I didn't have sex with him, so that's different."

"You didn't?" Jen said. "I thought you were going to."

"We were," Cammie said, "but I said I wasn't ready. We just fooled around." Jen nodded.

* * *

"_Devon," Jen giggled as her date pressed her against the wall of the house where they were at a party. They kissed for a few minutes. _

"_God, you're so hot," he muttered and slipped his hand in between her thighs. She squirmed and pushed it away. "Oh come on," he kissed her neck, "it's just fun," he undid his fly._

"_No," she pushed him away. "I'm not ready for that." He laughed._

"_I thought you'd be like your sister Jen," he said pushing her harder. She struggled against him for a few minutes and finally got her hands free and pushed him away hard._

"_I am," she said, "but not that way." She ran away and wiped her eyes, she hated that she was crying. _

"_Hey," Jared walked over to her. She looked at him. "What's wrong?"_

"_It's nothing," she whispered. She'd been on two dates with Jared. He was nice enough, and kind of cute. He looked at her. _

"_You came with Devon right?" He said. She nodded. His face softened and sat with her while she caught her breath._

"_You're not the first one who he's tried," he said, "he doesn't like no."_

"_I figured that out," she said quietly._

* * *

"Well, that's nice for you," Jen mumbled. Cammie looked at her.

"Look," Cammie said, "let's go down to the gym and practice the routine that we learned today. We'll cheer it out." Jen looked at her and laughed. "Whatever's going on Jen, you can tell me, when you're ready."

"Yeah, thanks," Jen said, "let's just go." They walked outside and Jen stopped seeing Julie waiting by her car. "Um, Cammie, I'll catch up."

"Sure," Cammie said and Jen walked over to Julie.

"What are you doing here?" Jen asked. Julie looked at her. "What?"

"Adam told me what happened." Julie said simply. Jen stared at her.

"Oh," Jen said, "well, I'm fine, as you can see," she turned to walk.

"You're not," Julie said. "Who was it?" Jen looked at her. "Devon right?" Jen nodded.

"How did you," she started, Julie looked at her and shrugged. "Did you and him?"

"No," Julie said, "but we did hang out, while I was with Paul, we made out a few times. He's very aggressive." Jen nodded. "I wish you'd told me."

"It really wasn't that big of a deal," Jen shrugged.

"It was a big enough deal for you to call Adam," Julie said. Jen looked away. "If you need someone to talk to, Jen, you can talk to me. Stay away from my boyfriend."

"So this isn't about you being concerned about me at all?" Jen said. "You don't trust me around Adam! God, you are such a hypocrite!" She marched away.

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	11. Most Important

**A/N: Thanks as always for reviewing! You guys are awesome**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing

* * *

Chapter 11: Most Important  
**

"Jennifer Gaffney," her composition teacher said. She looked up, they'd been in school for almost two weeks. "If you wouldn't mind staying after class." She nodded and the walked up to the desk once the bell rang. "Jen, I," he said with a sigh, "I've noticed a distinct change in your work this year."

"Is it not as good?" Jen asked. "What can I do to,"

"No, no," he shook his head, "it's very good. Exceptional in fact, you're showing a great deal of growth, but it just seems," he looked at her. "It's much darker in tone," Jen's eyes got big. "Is everything alright?"

"Of course," Jen nodded. "Really, I just," she searched her brain for a quick explanation, "I read a lot of Poe this summer, I found this old anthology in my father's office, I guess it stuck with me or something." There, that would solve it.

"Alright," he nodded. "Just, if you need someone to talk to." Jen nodded.

"I'm really alright," she said, "thank you for your concern though." She hurried out of the classroom and shuffled down the hallway. She noticed Julie shooting daggers out her eyes at her. They hadn't even talked since Julie had warned her away from Adam. Which was stupid. Like Jen even wanted Adam Banks anymore! What she did want, but knew she couldn't have was staring her in the face. Literally, the only person who's looks burned her more than Julie's were Dean's. Since she went to go see him that night she hadn't spoken to him. She was so scared that the minute Dean really touched her she'd just feel Devon's hands pressing her. It always happened with Jared, after all. She couldn't bear it with Dean.

"Hey Jen," Adam walked up to her. She looked at him.

"Uh hi," she said and kept walking. He followed after her. "Adam, come on." She groaned.

"Why are you avoiding me, exactly?" He asked. She crossed her arms.

"You know why," she said. "Julie doesn't want us to hang out or whatever."

"And you listened so well the last time she said that," he said. She laughed. "So, making out with Dean Portman is worth pissing her off, but being friends with me isn't? I see how it is." She shook her head.

"She doesn't trust us," Jen said.

"I know," he said. "Look, I just want to make sure you're doing OK."

"I am," she shrugged. "Thanks though."

"You're in Honors Geometry this semester right?" He asked and they kept walking.

"Uh huh," she said. "I'm doing OK." He looked at her. "OK, fine I need some help, but I'll find someone."

"You did find someone," he said. "I'm tutoring you again, because I rocked last year."

"Julie won't like it," she said.

"Let me deal with Julie," he said. She nodded. "Look Jen, if you need to talk we can talk. I know I wasn't great this summer."

"I shouldn't have lay it all on you," she said. "But thanks, I'm really doing OK." He smiled.

"OK, so I'll see you in the library today, after practice," he said. She nodded and he walked away, over to Julie. She looked at him.

"This is a bad idea," Julie said. He kissed her.

"You know she's too pissed at you to let you keep an eye on her," he said. She nodded. "I know you're worried, but Jules, I don't feel that way about her, not anymore."

"If you say so," Julie mumbled.

* * *

Jen sat on the steps at lunch time and ate quietly. She glanced over her shoulder and sighed as Fulton Reed sat down with her.

"What?" She said simply.

"Do you and your sister have some kind of pact with the devil to like kill him something?" Fulton asked. Jen looked at him and raised one eyebrow. "I mean, clearly you're not actual human beings you've just been sent to like reap his soul."

"First of all, if we were don't you think we would find a better soul?" Jen said. Fulton nodded. "And also, he broke Julie's heart, if you'll recall so that doesn't really hold up."

"Good point," Fulton said. "But still, you're really messing with his head."

"He had sex with me to make my sister jealous," she said. "Again, he wins with the head messing."

"He didn't have sex with you to make your sister jealous," he argued, "I mean he totally hit on you to make her jealous, I'll give you that. But he had sex with you because," she crossed her arms and looked at him. "You're kinda scary, has anyone ever told you that?"

"Yes," she said. "Please go away now." He looked at her. "God! What?"

"I just thought that maybe you should talk to him or something," Fulton shrugged. She looked at him.

"Did he ask you to talk to me?" She said. He frowned.

"Well, no," he said, "but I mean, I know, he's really being weird."

"You know, he hasn't talked to me either," she stood up. "Now please excuse me." She stood up and walked over to the table where the Ducks were sitting.

"Jen," Julie said, "this really isn't,"

"I'm not here to talk to you," Jen said and glared right at Dean. "If you have something to say to me Dean Portman, you can say it yourself!" He stared at her, mouth full.

"Uh," he managed to stutter and Jen just huffed and turned around. Julie looked at him. "Cat, dude, I swear I haven't talked to her in weeks."

"Right, sure," Julie said. He looked at her. "You better go, or else she'll probably never talk to you again." He stood up and followed Jen out into the hallway.

"OK, what was that about?" He said. She looked at him. "I mean, you showed up out of nowhere, and you kissed me, and you said you missed me, then you don't see me or talk to me again. And now you're pissed at me and I could see that, if I'd done something, but you haven't given me a chance to do anything." She looked at him. "God, you drive me insane, and I can't stand how I feel about you." She looked at him and swallowed.

"I know, I'm sorry," she said. "I just thought," she looked at him. "I meant it when I said I missed you, but I can't be with you!"

"Why not?" He said, "why not this time? Jenny, I'm over your sister. I want you," he stepped forward and put his hands on her hips. "Just you," he whispered.

"Don't," she whispered. "I can't, I just can't." He kissed her. "Dean," she whispered. "I just can't."

"Are you still scared of me?" He asked. "Of this, whatever the hell it is?"

"A little," she said.

"Don't be," he kissed her again. "We'll be perfect this time." She sighed and looked up at him.

"Can we just have fun, and see?" She whispered. He smiled and nodded.

"That sounds perfect," he said.

* * *

Julie lay in bed with Adam his arms around her from behind. She closed her eyes feeling his face press into her hair.

"I love you," she said. He smiled and hugged her closer.

"I love you too," he said. "You're the most important person in my life."

"Mmm," she smiled. "Right back at you."

"I mean it," he said as she rolled over onto her other side. "Julie, I don't know what I would do if I lost you."

"You won't though," she said softly. He smiled. "Not ever." He traced her face with his fingers and she smiled. "I won't ever leave you."

"Even if I do something stupid again?" He asked. She looked at him.

"I'll forgive you," she said and kissed him. "I'll forgive you anything." He smiled and kissed her softly.

"You really will huh?" He said.

"Yes," she nodded, "but don't test it!" He laughed.

"I won't," he smiled. She hugged him.

"Tell me again how important to you that I am," she stretched. He laughed.

"You're the sun and the moon," he kissed her neck. She giggled. "You're air and food and water." He tickled her side.

"OK, fine," she groaned, "let's just go to sleep." He smiled and she put her head on his chest. "I love you."

* * *

Portman groaned as Jen straddled him and they made out. Her hands were gripping hungrily at his shirt pulling him closer to her. He slid his hands over the bare skin on her lower back and she whimpered. This felt good, and wrong all at once. The usual mix of fear and bliss that she got when Dean touched her was there, and mixed with the way she'd been wallowing in self pity it was like a really hard drug. One that she liked taking a whole lot.

"Whoa, whoa," he said and pushed her back. She looked down at him. "You need to chill out, Jenny."

"Why?" She said. "It feels good." He smiled.

"Yeah," he nodded and pushed her off, "it does, but it feels, well," he swallowed, "familiar." Her face screwed up in confusion, sitting on her knees. "What exactly feels good?"

"What do you mean?" She asked and crawled back over to him. "You know. Us, this, we feel good." She kissed him. "All of it." He pulled her close again.

"Wait," he said softly. "Is it the fear?" She looked at him. "You said that you were afraid." She nodded. "Does the fear feel good? Right?"

"Well it," she looked at him, "not exactly, it just makes it exciting." She kissed him again and he pushed her away.

"Get out," he said sharply. She looked at him. "I'm serious, Jen, get out of here." She stood up and stared blankly at him.

"Dean, I don't understand," she whispered, "I thought you."

"I won't be the Gaffney girl thrill ride," he said simply, "not again." She stared at him.

"This is about Julie?" She said.

"No," he shook his head, "it's about me." He stared right at her, their eyes locked. "I know what I want. I want you, that's it end of story. But I'm not being your risk, or your way to piss off your parents, or Julie or whoever." She looked at him. "I did that before and I'm done with it. So if you want to be with me, awesome. But no way am I going through that again, so get out." Her eyes filled with tears and she ran out of the room. "Shit!" He muttered.

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